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  1. #1
    Join Date
    Mar 2008
    Posts
    9

    Default My Wife Won't Let Me See Our Daughter

    My wife and I had a fight. She then moved in with her mother and took our 20 month old daughter with her, along with all of her clothes, toys, etc. I wanted to pick up my daughter and keep her overnight while my wife worked (xray tech, graveyard shift). She said no. Next day, I called the sheriffs office and got lucky with a deputy who didn't know the law so well. He told her that she HAS to give my daughter to me. She complied, and I promised to bring her back by 9:30, which I did.
    Next day, she talks to a lawyer and he tells her that she DOES NOT have to hand her over to me if she's "afraid I won't bring her back." She's been using this as an excuse for the past 4 weeks to not let me take her. She's agreed twice to meet me somewhere with my daughter so I can play with her, but the last thing I want is my wife who I am divorcing hovering around like a vulture with her arms crossed. I met her anyway, and my daughter cried hysterically when we parted.
    So I filed for divorce, and things got ugly. She cleaned out my bank account, shut off my cell phone, took me off the healthcare, etc.
    I know the law says we both have 50% custody, but as long as my daughter is over there with my wife and mother-in-law, I'll never get to see her. I'm afraid the judge will just say "well, she's been the primary caregiver for the past 2 months, so she gets primary custody." My wife has been acting unstable and irrational since the filing, and I know she takes prozac and wellbutrin and drinks alcohol, to boot. Her mother is disabled and has no business caring for a 20 month old for 13 hours at a stretch.

    Any ideas how I can see my daugher? My attorney hasn't really been there for me, and I'm getting more and more anxious (it's 5:30am right now, and I can't sleep).

    Thanks

    Gt

  2. #2
    Join Date
    Dec 2007
    Location
    Ohio
    Posts
    2,006

    Default Re: My Wife Won't Let Me See Our Daughter

    You said you filed for divorce, what is your divorce attorney doing about this?
    Why hasn't he taken the soon to be ex to court for custody/visitation for temporary orders? Are you paying child support?
    If your attorney really hasn't been there, then why don't you get another one? Why are you paying for something that your not getting? And what do you mean that he/she "hasn't really been there for me?"

    Your wife may continue to act unstable, divorce is not easy and neither is raising a 20 month old and having to live with your mother. It is also not illegal to take antidepressants which are prescribed by a physician. It's also not illegal for her to drink on them, its a choice but it's not recommended, it doesn't make it illegal.

  3. #3
    Join Date
    Mar 2008
    Posts
    9

    Default Re: My Wife Won't Let Me See Our Daughter

    My attorney takes her time responding to my calls and emails.
    Back on the 21st, she said "I spoke to your wife's attorney late this afternoon and I was assured that you will start getting overnights next week and I am sending an Agreed Order that neither of you will take your child out of the state without court order"
    There was a hearing yesterday (I filed a motion to keep her from taking my daughter out of the state), and my lawyer said this:
    "An Agreed Order was sent regarding you daughter not leaving the country. Now your wife is saying you can have visitation, but not overnight, so I told her attorney I was setting it for hearing."
    I don't pay child support yet, but my wife did clean out my bank account.
    I've given my atty a $2500 retainer, and if I switch lawyers now, I'll lose that plus I'll have to get my next atty up to speed, and that will mean more time wasted.
    I know taking meds and drinking isn't illegal, but it doesn't make it right, does it? When she goes to work for 13 hours, she leaves my daughter with her disabled mother.

  4. #4
    Join Date
    Mar 2008
    Posts
    106

    Default Re: My Wife Won't Let Me See Our Daughter

    What the Judge and/or medatior wants to see is what is in the best interest of a child. Only the facts, not bad mouthing each other. Visit your child as often as your wife will allow. But it will take time to finalize the custody/visitation orders. Make sure you fight for more and more visits but do not bad mouth her mother. Look cool calm and in control. Of course a mother and father disagree during divorce. The best thing you can do is stay calm. I know this is not fair and you want to see your daughter way way more. But in time everything will be written out and I'm sure you will have her over night. Ask your lawyer when you can see a mediatior.

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