[Prouddad41603]

Back in January of 2006 I went to court with my son's mother, never married, and was awarded shared parental rights and responsibilities. We had week on/week off custody, and no child support was awarded to either party. It remained like that until 9-01-2007, when I made the decision, that I thought it at the time in our son's best interest that he go primary residence with his mother. I made this descion because we live 30 mins from each other, and thought it too unstable when he got in pre-kindergarten to keep rotating like we had, and wanted him to have a more stable environment. So I get him now every Thursday, every other weekend, and take him to church on the Sunday's his mother has him. I've been paying her $300/month child support consistantly since 9-01-07. Nothing of this new arrangement has been filed with the court yet, and we have not been back to court since 1-2006. It is simply something we verbally agreed on. Since 9-2007, many issues and problems have happened on the mothers end and disputes between us, and I now feel it in our sons best interest that he be with me. My questions are 1.) Do I still have the right to tell her I want to go back to shared custody immediately since nothing has been filed with the court, and 2.) Since I've made this verbal arrangement w/ her, and 5 + months have elapsed, do I still stand a chance to win in court for primary custody? Before spending $500 to consult w/ an attorney I figured I'd get some advice from here, and possibly other fathers who have been through the same thing. Thanks.

[525601minutes]

You are both in violation of a court order. I suggest you tell her immediately that you MUST return to the order as written by the courts ASAP. It is doubtful that you will get 100% physical custody - if that is what you mean by "full custody" - unless she poses a grave danger to the child. Even then the abusive parent is usually allowed at least supervised visits.

To stop the constant back and forth you may want to consider filing with the court and asking that the new custody agreement be with you during the school week and with the mother on long weekends, spring & winter breaks and during most of the summer.