[Mojorisin]

Ok so heres the deal. Shortly after I was divorced I moved home to Indiana. Here I was working two jobs and receiving food stamps and rental assistance. I have 3 small children whom I wasnt receiving child support for.

After being home a few months I met someone and we started to date. He would stay at the house a few nights a week but was not living there nor was his address listed as there. He still had another home.

In Feb. he asked me to marry him and it was planned for may. So I went to the welfare office and told them that I was getting married and that I would not need the services anymore. The services were discontinued the first of may. Just before we were married, like normal we moved the rest of his belongings in, changed his address etc etc.

So here we are being married for almost two years now. I finally got up enough guts to go after my ex for child support. He is behind in the amount of 21,000 plus. I went to the child support office and had his wages garnished. Apon his notification of the garnishment he called me and threatend me with everything under the sun. Including but not limited to welfare fraud. He said my current husband was living with me the whole time I was receiving benefits..(2 years ago) and that he could prove it.

So now im scared that I will be investigated. He says he can prove it but I honstly dont know how to disprove it.

I have not been contacted by the police or welfare as of yet but I know he will try his best to get me in trouble. Any suggestions of what to do to put my mind at ease or so I can go about this the smart way would be greatly appreciated.

[gigirle]

You said you did nothing wrong... The proof you need if you needed it would be in the form of a lease or copy of one stating his address at the time.

Ignore the ex, this is his way of threatening you. He was just socked with a 21,000 back order for child support that does not include the regular order, he's pissed and has to take it out on someone. Let the burden of proof be on him as it is and worry about that bridge when you come to it, if you do. Doubt anyone will listen to him...if you have to reply to the idiot it should be in the form of .."talk to my lawyer, would you like his number?"

[Mojorisin]

I was hoping it would be something as simple as that thank you.

Its just scarey when you are dealing with hateful people like we are. For example... They have called the welfare office on me twice now aying I abuse..do not feed my children. Of course they come and check me out to see my house is spotless, cubbords are full and the only mark on the kids is either kool aid face or crayon lol. Its just disheartening because they constantly do these things to me.

But ya, my landlord has my lease which only has my name on it and I guess his would be the word of his parents? Or perhaps mail or bills at his old address?

[gigirle]

That is good enough. I hate to say this but your stuck with these hateful people for a bit. Make sure that you doucument EVERYTHING. By welfare office, do you mean Dept of Children and family services? They have to by law, come out an investigate all alligations. Your clean so just smile and comply. This will come back to bite him in the behind later. I get your frustration...what he doesn't get is why his has to pay. You have moved on with your life and this is I'm sure also eating at him. The best revenge is happiness and he sees this. Hold your head high and thank whoever helped you and your children get out of that life!

[Mojorisin]

Yes, it is the office of family and children.

ANd yes, I am very grateful for my new husband. He has basically went from living as a singleman with no bills to a father of 3 and provider of 5 overnight. I thank god every day.

As for my ex, he now has 2 more children with his new wife. He does the whole thing where he goes months without seeing my 3, then calls, doesntshow up and then im stuck with three heart broken angels. Happens everytime.
As for the support, he says he shouldnt pay because I dont work outside of the home to support them..why should he? My husband takes careof us and doesnt want me to work.

I know, its silly. I really dont understand his way of thinking, but its scarey to think that sometimes, stupid people like him actually prevail in situations like this.

I should also add that Im 26 and have never had to deal with legal isues of any type before so all commentsarewelcomed because I am quite literally... clueless

[gigirle]

As for my ex, he now has 2 more children with his new wife

Oh he has to behave this way...she's puttin the squeeze on!
Document everything and I can't stress this enough. Time/date what time he calls, gets the kids, etc. It will never hurt to have it, but could bite you in the behind if you don't.

What ever he says to you regarding whether or not you should work....tell him to explain it to the judge, as he will get his day in court. It can be before or after he explains why he put 3 kids on this earth and doesn't feel that he should pay/aid in any of their support.

[Mojorisin]

Thank you so so much for your help. The knots in my stomache are beginning to fade. It was hard enough to go after him for support. Standing up to someone who has belittled you for years untill you are a small, timid, uncertain individual is hard enough with out him pulling this legal crap on me.
Knowing there are people out there willing to help and to understand the situation is priceless.

[gigirle]

has belittled you for years untill you are a small, timid, uncertain individual is hard enough

Yes it is...stay strong and keep focused, it may get worse before it gets better...just keep focused and you'll be fine! Good Luck