[canuck]

Hello, I am a 20 year old male and have been in a relationship with my girlfriend for almost a year. We have been living in our current apartment for just over 5 months now. On Sept 4th 2005 we had a heated arguement, where I lost my cool and was threatening to damage some of her possesions if she left and went out for the night. During the process I smashed a beer bottle. She called the police, and when they arrived, they talked to us seperatly. An officer asked her if she had any bruises and she showed him a bruise that was on her arm from me hitting her on the arm about 3 or 4 days prior to this night, from us goofing around. We were not in a fight or arguement to my memory when she recieved the bruise. I was arrested and brought to jail, charged with domestic assault. Apparently she also had bruises on her legs that I believe she stated were from me punching her also, which is not true! Why would I punch her in the legs and how? (She bruises incredibly easy and always has bruises somewhere on her body, wether it be from work, or being intimate, etc) I was released the next morning and was allowed to return to our apartment under the conditions that I do not harass annoy molest or physically intefere with her. Since this has happened our relationship has been much better. We have been getting along great and helping eachother out with alot of different things. My question or concern is, what is going to happen to me? I have never been charged with a crime before, arrested, or even inside a police car. I don't officially have a lawyer right now but I have talked to one who told me to look for him at my court date. A woman from victims service has had a meeting with my girlfriend and they said they were both going to have a meeting with the crown and push for a program called early intervention, which is basiclly a conseling/therapy program. Also, since this has happened, the police have been back here once, over a little mishap and disturbance between my gf and I. I was the one who phoned them, but nothing happened because of it. Both myself and my girlfriend just want this to be done with and I want nothing more then to have my life normal again. I am so worried about what will happen I can barely sleep. My court hearing is on thr 19th of this month. Can anyone PLEASE provide me with some advice guidance or info on what will most likely happen to me? Is there a chance the crown may order me to leave? I would have nowhere to go, and I'm not a wealthy person. I plan on going back to college once I pay off my student debt this year but would be unable to if I have a criminal record. Is there anything I can do to further educate or defend myself on this matter? Can my girlfriend do anything to help me? She would be willing but this is out of her hands, since she isnt the one charging me. Any info would be appreciated, I'm a normal person and a good person. I have no history of any violent behaviour whatsoever and this expierience has really helped change me into a better person. Also, I have no seen or read the police report or statements from my gf. Thanks in advance and godbless.

[Mr. Knowitall]

You should confirm this with your lawyer, but it seems likely that your successful completion of the "early intervention" program would permit you to minimize the consequence of the charge and perhaps even to avoid a conviction.

[misshim22]

hi im 17 years old, i am turning 18 this august. i've read your article and i felt that it relates w/ my incident. i find my incident very pathetic; i and my boyfr
iend both are charged with domestic assault. we were having verbal argument which lead to me pushing him lightly. then he lightly pushed me back too then i bit him. but overall, we were mostly having a verbal argument, which is normal with us when we argue. i left bite marks on his arm and he left me no marks. we concluded to both being charged with domestic violence. thus i am forbidden to have any contact with him whatsoever. i am very scared and shocked because my boyfriend and i rarely argue and when we do, such a thing is a normal thing between the two of us. similar with you, i am worried about my future life and my record. i've recently graduated from high school and supposedly will be attending Ryerson University (BScN), which I worked for very hard. With my charges, i am frightened that my future hopes will be shatttered, nursing school means alot to me. he is very good to me and so am i, we are both good people and we love eachother very much. Moreover, my boyfriend had issues with the law before which recently have been dealt with. he went to college and worked full-time at the same time. most of his money went to his lawyer. this worries me because he recently just got his life back and i feel that i ruined it for him since he has to get a lawyer once again. also because his school will get affected and he is currently doing well with it. hence, i am not a wealthy person neither and have no idea how i'd have the money to pay a lawyer. i wouldn't want my education to get affected too. i want my normal life back and hope that our future life does not get affected so much. please provide me an idea on what i will encounter in the future and some advice on how i can prevent our education to get affected. what is the quickest way out of this for the both of us?, i just want to get on with our normal lives.

[aaron]

Get a lawyer and consult with your lawyer how you might avoid a criminal conviction. If you wish to further explore your options, you should start your own thread.