[elseyw]

I am a professional woman who has never committed any kind of offense - well, maybe a parking ticket when I was in college. While my husband and I had been having arguments lately, we have a good marriage and look forward to growing old together.
However, after drinking way too much during a full day Memorial Day party this May, my husband and I had an argument that spiraled to me slapping and hitting his face. My husband called the police to scare me and get me to calm down, and when they arrived, I admitted to them that I had hit my husband. Immediately the handcuffs were on. Okay - so now I'm scared! The police asked my husband if he wanted me to go to jail for the night, and further told him that I would not be charged with anything if he made a few phone calls.
Now I been charged with battery and assault and have arraignment in Georgia in mid-October. My husband has made repeated calls to the victim's advocate and she says she cannot help, but that he can talk to the prosecutor at the arraignment. I don't have a lawyer, and wonder if searching the yellow pages for one at this time is a good idea. I wouldn't even know what to look for.
I am torn between pleading guilty, because I DID hit him. Or pleading innocent, because it was a minor altercation and I had no intent to hurt him significantly - mostly just had frustration and wanted him to listen to me.
I realize I was wrong, and I have only had four glasses of wine in the four months since the incident - where I was drinking a couple of glasses of wine several days a week before. We still have arguments and the stress of these charges is difficult to handle, but we do have a strong and loving relationship.
My questions - how should I plead, considering my husband had no intent for this to go this far and is ready to support me, but the facts are what they are?
Will my husband really get a chance to talk to the prosecutor at the arraignment? And will this do any good?
If I plead guilty and just get this all behind us, will I have a criminal record for the rest of my life - this is important to me, as I am a conscientious law-abiding citizen, and realize the gravity of this on the rest of my life.
If I plead innocent, will that just extend the inevitable, as I really did hit him? Or is there a chance this really can all be administratively dismissed, as the police officer originally told my husband?
Lastly, should I start looking through the yellow pages for legal advice - I have no idea how to find a legitimate lawyer, as I have never needed services like this before?

[blueeagle]

First of all, I have NEVER seen a domestic violence case where the victim was male.

If you are charged with a crime you should being looking for a lawyer. The sooner the better.

I would not advise taking a plea bargain. A jury of your peers may be your only chance for acquittal, and to avoid a criminal record. It you are convicted, appeal it! Also, a judge told me that a jury will rarely convict a woman.

Technically your husband could call the DA's office, and request to have the charges dropped today. But they are under no obligation to comply, and they rarely will. Sure, it will hurt their case if, but they could still take you to trial without his approval.

You see, in 75% of all Domestic violence cases the victim will request to have the charges dropped with in 48 hours. Wait a week and that number rises to 90%. If the DA dismissed every case then justice would never be served. Sometimes they have to protect the victim from themselves.


I suggest you find a criminal defense attorney ASAP. If you are indigent to the point where you cannot afford a attorney, one will be appointed by the court.

[elseyw]

I have been looking for a lawyer, and have called a few. I'd like some advice on whether their conversations (FREE consultations) are legit. Two have suggested trying to get a deferral, which I'm understanding to mean that the prosecutor would put everything hold for a few months while I attend court appointed counseling (which I am totally open to do) and that if all goes well and reports from the counselor and my husband are good, then the charges would probably be dropped at the end of the counseling. They are telling me, in initial free consultations, that nothing would appear on my record except for the arrest, and even that could be expunged from my record as well, so that eventually nothing would appear.
They are further telling me that this will cost between $3000 and $3500 to have them represent me to have this happen (with no guarantees, of course).
Not ever having to deal with lawyers before, is this story, which I've gotten from two contacts, legitimate? Or are they trying to intice me into paying them a large sum of money with their "good" news? Are these fees appropriate? Is this outcome possible? Could I get the same outcome if I contacted the assistant solicitor myself in the next couple of days? Should I contact the solicitor directly? What should I say?

[Litigator]

Getting a lawyer is good advice. I have had DV cases where the male was the victim. In one case which concerned 2 different counts the prosecution agreed to nol pros (dismiss) one count and on the other count for which the client initially received jail time the prosecutor agreed to probation with the agreement that the client's record would be expunged upon the successful completion of the probation. Many attorneys do offer free consultations but you should understand there is a difference between free consultations and a meeting where a lawyer is going to advise you for free on how to conduct your own defense.

Each case is different and the outcome depends on its peculiar facts and circumstances but handling the case on your own is something I would not recommend you to do.