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  1. #1
    Join Date
    Aug 2007
    Posts
    5

    Default Custody of Child After Death of Parent

    I would like to have a last will drawn up in the near future and I am not sure of the proper way to go about this. I left my husband when my son was 18 months old because he was abusive. In the last 4 years my ex-husband has seen my son 3 times. One of those times was at a support hearing where he passed him in the hallway and didn't recognize it was his son. The other 2 times he visited my son in my home for 40 minutes. Otherwise this man has had no contact with my son; no birthday/Christmas gifts, phone calls, cards or letters. He has not made a single voluntary support payment and basically is not interested in being a part of his life. I have no problem with this.

    If something were to happen to me, I cannot bear the thought of my son going to live with his biological father. My reasons do not revolve around the abuse alone. My son has no idea who this man is and it would not be in his best interest to live with him. I plan to get married soon to the man my son calls Daddy. Additionally, his godmother is willing and able to provide a healthy and stable environment if something were to happen to me.

    Is there a way to provide a legally binding clause or statement in my will that will allow my son's Godmother custody in the event of my death? I plan to have my entire estate put into a trust for my son with her as the executor. My life insurance and assets are more than enough to provide my son with a full education to any college he would want to attend in addition to supporting him financially into adulthood.

    My soon-to-be husband does plan to adopt my son. Until that happens I worry about the welfare of my son in the event of my death.

    I live in Illinois and the biological father lives in PA

    Thank you for any advice you can give.

  2. #2
    Join Date
    Jul 2006
    Location
    Florida
    Posts
    2,772

    Default Re: Custody of Child After Death of Parent

    Quote Quoting justamom
    View Post
    I would like to have a last will drawn up in the near future and I am not sure of the proper way to go about this. I left my husband when my son was 18 months old because he was abusive. In the last 4 years my ex-husband has seen my son 3 times. One of those times was at a support hearing where he passed him in the hallway and didn't recognize it was his son. The other 2 times he visited my son in my home for 40 minutes. Otherwise this man has had no contact with my son; no birthday/Christmas gifts, phone calls, cards or letters. He has not made a single voluntary support payment and basically is not interested in being a part of his life. I have no problem with this.

    If something were to happen to me, I cannot bear the thought of my son going to live with his biological father. My reasons do not revolve around the abuse alone. My son has no idea who this man is and it would not be in his best interest to live with him. I plan to get married soon to the man my son calls Daddy. Additionally, his godmother is willing and able to provide a healthy and stable environment if something were to happen to me.

    Is there a way to provide a legally binding clause or statement in my will that will allow my son's Godmother custody in the event of my death? I plan to have my entire estate put into a trust for my son with her as the executor. My life insurance and assets are more than enough to provide my son with a full education to any college he would want to attend in addition to supporting him financially into adulthood.

    My soon-to-be husband does plan to adopt my son. Until that happens I worry about the welfare of my son in the event of my death.

    I live in Illinois and the biological father lives in PA

    Thank you for any advice you can give.
    Only possesions and assets can be willed, humans cannot be. I understand your concern though. Since your ex hasn't been a part of your son's life it's very likely that a court would not allow him to take custody if you pass on. The best thing to do now would be to get a consult with a good family law attorney in your area to see exactly what you need to do now to ensure that your son won't automatically be given to a father who he doesn't know.

  3. #3
    Join Date
    Mar 2005
    Location
    Michigan
    Posts
    28,639

    Default Re: Custody of Child After Death of Parent

    Upon the death of the custodial parent, the traditional rule is that the other parent gains custody of the child, even though he did not previously have physical custody, and even if the deceased parent has prepared a will designating a non-parent as the child's custodian.

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