[ct78]

Hello,
I am here in CT and have an involved case. My husband and I have been separated for the past 6 months and had filed for divorce. We just fled for reconciliation and started marriage counseling and plan on staying married etc.... While we were seperated my husband dated and got a girl pregnant ( he broke up with her, and then found out a month and a half later she is preg).
If this child is his (he will have a paternity test done after child is born) he wants to be an active father in this baby's life. His ex wants him on the birth certificate and wants his money, but doesn't want him to see the baby more than here and there etc.... What are his rights (assuming he is the dad). She is saying he cannot have unsupervised visits because he'll be a bad dad, (she wants to supervise the visits because she is still trying everything to get him back) and that the baby can never be around me. Can she dictate this? Mind you, my husband and I have a one year old daughter and are both superb parents, have a house in a wonderful neighborhood and would give this baby anything. while she (the ex) plans are raising the baby on welfare, has no support system, works crazy hours, lives in a bad area, has no medical insurance etc.... So, I guess I wonder what my husbands and my rights are to parenting time and possible joint custody? With a newborn, how do visits work? Are they granted right away? Can she keep the baby from spending time with our family? Should we seek a lawyer now or wait until the baby is born? Thanks.....Kirsten

Unsupervised visits are granted when the other parent poses a possible threat to the safety of the child such is not the case here. In the beginning visits will need to be with Mom so she can feed/care for child this even more so if breast feeding. He has the same rights as the Mother and her threats are empty

[Just Breath]

I don't believe that is entirely true, Panther. Since the unborn child's parents are not married, only the mother will automatically have legal custody rights at the time of birth...even if the father signs the birth certificate. He can either file a petition to establish the parent -child relationship and request genetic testing to determine his paternity.....or if the mother intends to go on welfare, he can be sure that a child support suit will be filed against him by the government and he can request genetic testing at that time.

Once paternity is established, he may have a good shot at joint custody...and will have probably no more than standard visitation which will be limited during the child's infancy only (such as no overnights until the child reaches a specific age). However, breastfeeding will not determine whether or not he can exercise his visitation. The mother can pump milk to supply the father during his visitation.

Until he is adjudicated as the child's father and gains custody and/or visitation rights through the court, the father does not have the same legal rights as the mother.....in fact, he has none at all.

You are of course correct however my statement was meant if paternity had already been established. I was just assuming that child was his of course that is not known yet.