Mother Gave Ex-Husband's Name To Baby, Not Proved To Be His

[Bel212]

Here is my ordeal . I am engaged to a man my family dislikes. He moved out of state to keep my family from pursuing custody of my then, two minor children. I was pregnant when he left and recently gave birth to his son. While away, he; according to him, made a one night mistake with his ex wife. She ended up pregnant and didn't know whom the father was. She recently (7 days ago) gave birth to this child and is claiming it to be his. The child doesn't resemble him at all. My fiance is half Korean and in his other two children, you can tell they have Asian genes. She resides in Fairfax County Virginia. I have several questions about the issue: BTW.. THANK YOU SINCERELY NOW.

1.) Since as of right now, she is not pursuing a DNA test to prove he is his, can he somehow speed up the process? My fiance and I reside in Missouri and the child and mother live in Virginia.

2.) They were married at one time and she is claiming the costs are too expensive to change her last name. The child now has my fiance's last name as well as she does. If proven not to be the biological father (which he doesn't want to be) is there any way to have the childs last name changed to that of his biological father?

3.) IF proven to be the biological father, he has stated he wants to sign away any and all parental rights. (She has acknowledged she was trying to get pregnant JUST to have that tie to him and receive money; however, they only were together once) He told her from the beginning he didn't want a child with her. She also acknowledges she only wants money and would not render to any visitation or any contact. Can he sign away rights yet still be obligated finacially to the child?

4.) Also IF proven not to be his, can he enforce that she take on her maiden name?

5.) IF not his also, could we file harrassment charges against her for claiming to everyone (including his family) that the child is his?

6.) How quickly could this matter be resolved in Virginia as we are about to move to another state?

Thanks so much in advance for any and all help. It is continuesly driving me nutty to know what our options are and how quickly we can get it resolved. I'm unsure has to how many possibilities there actually are. I know of two others besides my fiance. She is just looking to keep that tie to him. But I'm looking to get his last name changed as quickly as possible IF proven NOT his.

[Just Breath]

He can file a petition to determine parent-child relationship and request DNA testing for confirmation. If he's not father, he won't have to support the child. If he is, he will have to pay support.

If he's not the father, he can ask the Court to change the child's name, but it is unlikely it would be granted. If his ex-wife still legally carries his last name, there's no reason why the court would order her to rename the child. She has the right to name the child whatever she wants. If she is not married to the biological father, whoever he may be, she can't be made to name the child after an unknown person, anyway. If the bio father is determined and paternity established, the name change is still up to the judge to determine the child's best interest and, if she's going to end up a single mom anyway, the court will likely rule that the child's best interest would be to share the mother's last name......even if that name is the same as your fiance's.

[Just Breath]

Oh....and if he is found to be the father, then he will not be able to avoid support by surrendering his rights unless another man is waiting in the wings to adopt the child (like a stepfather). He can, however, choose not to seek visitation or custody rights.

If the child's paternity is unknown, then no one can dispute his possible paternity, so I see no grounds for harrassment charges against her for claiming he's the father. He admits he had sex with her during the probable period of conception....and, it only takes "1 time" to make a baby.

There is no quick way to resolve this through the courts.

[Bel212]

Thank you so much! It's not any news I wanted to hear, but I can't change the law. Could he though, force her to take back her maiden name because of the problems it would pose for him and his other two children? Can we petition the courts and pay for it ourselves or would the judge even see a case such as that?

[Just Breath]

If their divorce order did not stipulate that she was to return to any other name, then she already has the legal right to continue carrying his surname....and, therefore, the right to give her child that name.

I'm confused. Who is the mother of his other two children? You or the ex-wife? If you are the mother, have you ever been married to him or just engaged.

Could he though, force her to take back her maiden name because of the problems it would pose for him and his other two children? Can we petition the courts and pay for it ourselves or would the judge even see a case such as that?

What problems are you anticipating? It's just a name. Many unrelated people carry the same surname.

[Bel212]

He has a child, which is almost 8, at the time we met. I now have his 2nd child which is almost 4 months old. The option was given in the divorce but she opted to keep her married name, although she promised him she would be changing it back. Now there is this 3rd child in question. She is the type of person that would try and cause problems even after paternity is either dis/established. He is in the Army Reserves and I can see her doing many different things. She tried while he was still in the Regular Army. She would use that child (which carries his last name) to her benefit. And probably even inform everyone that it's his just for the incentives.

[Just Breath]

It if were that easy to get "incentives", then why couldn't ANYONE with the same last name as your husband apply?