Troubled Teen Wants To Move Out

**kwrnr1961** · 06-02-2007, 05:06 AM

My wife and I have a similar situation here in Maryland. Our 17-year old son turns 18 in Aug. We've had a stressful relationship with him for several years. We recently suspended his driving privileges due to his third vehicle accident in less than 9 months which resulted in his vehicle being totaled and thankfully, no injuries. He just graduated high school. Now, he is refusing to follow household rules and wants to move out. He wants to move in with a co-worker. He takes medication for a couple of mental health issues and has expressed a desire to stop taking it. From a legal standpoint, I understand we are legally liable for his actions until he turns 18 at which point he becomes emancipated. Is this always the case, even if he doesn't live with us? Second, is there anything we can do if he refuses to come home, other than call the police? Right now, we're just trying to get through the next two months and then I suppose he can do as he wishes when he turns 18. Any assistance is greatly appreciated!

**seniorjudge** · 06-02-2007, 06:53 AM

From a legal standpoint, I understand we are legally liable for his actions until he turns 18 at which point he becomes emancipated.

Who told you this?

**Mr. Knowitall** · 06-02-2007, 07:42 AM

It's both an overstatement and an understatement. You are not universally responsible for his actions while he is a minor, and you may continue to be responsible for some of his actions (particularly insofar as you contribute to those actions) after he is an adult.

**lespring** · 06-25-2007, 04:19 AM

What will magically change in 2 months? Let him move out. He's determined he wants to live like an adult, and he's TRYING to make your life a living hell so that you'll get mad enough and kick him out. I know how this works...my soon-to-be 19 year old has Paranoid Schizophrenia. He spent 12 months in a hospital facility and was discharged the day he turned 18 because they could no longer legally keep him. He has an IQ of 180 and uses it to his every advantage. My son is off all meds because...well..he's an adult now and I have no say over what meds he does/does not take. This drives me crazy but there isn't much I can do about it.

So, how about this. You can appease him by "making a plan" for him to move out. Say, "Ok John, here are the steps we need to take. You're going to need some money set aside to live off of. Lets say $500. You spend the next couple of months working and we'll put that money in the bank. You'll need some household things, lets start collecting those. (take him garagesale shopping or something) Let him be proactactive in the process instead of it being a battle. Also, loosen the rules a little bit. Say, "If you can't be home by midnight please calls so I know I can lock the door, or sleep knowing that you're safe. If he's responsible about actually calling DO NOT yell at him when he calls!!!! Why would he want to call if he knows he's going to get yelled at? Be thankful that he's safe and that he was responsible enough to call and let you know he's not coming home.

If he can see that you're trying to HELP him move out, he might be more willing to stay a couple more months. But if he's not...who cares? Let him go! It's only 2 months. There is no magical moment the second he turns 18. He's doing what every teenager does, the problem is you throw mental health issues into the mix and they become very difficult, if not impossible, to reason with.