[tinykim]

My ex-husband died several years ago in Georgia without a will. We had only been divorced for 10 months but I had his minor child, born during our long-time marriage. However, another woman in California claimed to have given birth to his child while we were married. I don't believe she put my husband's name on the birth certificate. Even if she did, he didn't agree to it and was not present at the birth. When her child was about 2 years-old, she apparently filed for welfare and the state forced her to name the father. She gave my husband's name, although he had never acknowledged paternity and was not sure if the child was really his. The state contacted my husband about the welfare action. This was before DNA so I don't know what he was required to do. (I never really read the letter - I dropped it on the floor once I realized that he might have cheated on me and produced a child! ) By the way, the letter did not come directly to our new address - it was delivered to his father's home in California, his last known address, and his father forwarded to my husband in the state that we were living at the time. He never responded and nothing else was ever sent to him. We found out later that the woman decided not to go through with the welfare request and nothing more was ever heard on the matter.

Now this is the issue....my son is grown now and I believe it is important for him to file for Letters of Administration for his father. Although he died with no real property, he has a few published songs which are still being played and recorded. I was going to file for administration upon his death but the clerk told me that, with my child still being a minor, it would be more trouble that it was worth to do so at that time. So I decided to just waited until he had reached age 18.

Can someone tell me if the other child is considered an heir? Remember there is no proof that she is my husband's child - he never acknowledged paternity, did not sign an affidavit allowing his name to be put on the child's birth certificate (if it is there), the mother never filed a paternity suit in his lifetime. What is the age of majority in California for this purpose? Is there a statute of limitations for a child to file its own paternity suit upon reaching the age of majority? If the child does so, who has to pay for it as it will have to one of those "reverse paternity" tests since he is dead and his remains cremated?

I bear no animosity towards the child (although it took a real long time for me to feel this way! ). I don't want to refer to the child as "illegitimate" because all of God's children are legitimate. However, not all are legal heirs or issue for the purposes of the law. And I am not going delude myself by swearing to the fact that he never signed anything - he cheated on me so you know I don't trust him like that!! But when I filed for Social Security Survivor's benefits for my child, the other woman made no claim at that time or later, which you would think that she would do if she had the legal right. She knew when he died and how to reach his family in California.

As for the royalties, we are not talking about a lot of money at this time but, with the way the music business is, you never know. I just want my son to have ownership of his father's copyrights and be able to administer them. Copyrights are negotiable and pass on to the writer's legal successors. And this situation must be faced squarely at some time in the very near future.

Thanks.

[rmet4nzkx]

Since you don't give any year for the birth, it makes it difficult to give you an answer as different laws apply, some men have been determined to be the legal father because they failed to respond. I suppose if you want an answer you and the other woman could agree to get your children tested to determin if the share a common father.

[tinykim]

I'm not THAT over it to want to even see that wench!! I'm pissed that I even have to ponder this mess right now. And my three kids are not interested enough in this matter to submit to any testing.

The letter was received 20 years ago so the child in question must be in her early 20s. Again, it was only a letter, sent by regular mail - not a summons, so there was no proof of service. Back then, I don't think the courts were as gung-ho because blood tests could only tell who the father WASN'T, not who he WAS. And I don't recall anyone being hauled into labs to give up blood back them- I think those initial notices were just sent out to see if a man would sign an affidavit admitting paternity or, at least, take on his responsibility if he felt that he was truly the father. Remember the letter went to his my husband's father's address, which was never really his place of residence but I guess the woman had to give up some location. By the time it got my husband, several months had gone by (my husband and his father were not close and it took him a while to locate us in another state), and the time requirement had long expired. And child support enforcement at that time was a joke. Way too many deserving children and not nearly enough employees to handle the case loads.

Oh, now I remember something......I think his name WAS on the birth certificate without his prior knowledge. That's how CPS (or whatever it's called in California) got his name. The woman had to give up an address or she wouldn't qualify for benefits since the government wants the father to pay if he is able. That was about the time when the government was just starting to THINK about getting serious about seeing that parents paid child support because it had gotten tired of having to pay for the children of working non-custodial parents. Later, we heard that she knew that she had no proof of paternity so she rescinded her application for welfare. And not to make her sound like a bum, she had lost her job and filed for temporary assistance, not knowing that she would be forced to name a father for her child and his possible location. From what I heard at the time, she just did what she had to do, but got gainful re-employment within a few weeks. So everything was dropped in favor of cases where the fathers had been located and were residing in California or states with reciprocity.

As for why she possibly named my husband on the birth certificate, I would not be surprised if they had slept together a few times (HE claimed it was ONCE - yeah, right! ) because she had been after him for years. At the risk of being catty, she is a taco short of a combination plate, and was a little delusional when it came to the men in her life. (Yes, the heifer knew me personally, although we were not friends, so it wasn't like his being married was was a big surprise. If she knew she had a cheatin' ass married dog in her bed, she should have guarded against pregnancy so as not to subject an innocent child to her drama.) So you can see why her interests are not paramount to me. If she didn't do what she needed to do to protect those of her child, that's her problem - I'm not going to assist her now after all of these years. I just want to protect MY children. Now if my husband was still alive and he and that child wanted to know the truth, then my feelings might differ. BUT HE'S NOT - OH, WELL!!!

People always think that the wife shouldn't take it out on the child but my opinion is that, if the child's own mother didn't care about how the child would be affected, why should I? I had my feelings hurt badly by the indiscretion of my husband and a family acquaintance. I still loved him at the time and I had to do what I needed to do to make it so I could go on in my marriage. If he so much as looked like he wanted to be with her, I would have sent his punk ass to her at MY expense, but he begged for my forgiveness and spent many years (and even more money buying me jewelry) to regain a semblance of the trust I had in him prior to that mess. That's why I ain't mad at Kobe's wife. If the bitches want the honey, I'll take the money!!!

[rmet4nzkx]

Now that you have vented, do you feel better?
20 years ago a child could be named on a birth certificate in CA without an AOP. CSE in CA called DCSS could legally establish paternity for a child based solely on the birth certificate or who the woman named as father if she applied for welfare and based upon a notice mailed USPS. There have been a number of lawsuits where similar things have happened, in fact a landmark case where the child support was ordered under similar circumstances. CA has a 2 year limit to disestablish paternity, so if it was established, it is too late to disestablish it since you husband received his notice and refused to respond or deny paternity. He may not owe child support simply because the woman went back to work and chose to support this child without your husband's help. If a child support order was established, your husband's estate might be responsible for child support if and or when probate is opened whether or not this is his biological child. You have chosen to to deny your children the right to know of their possible siblings, DNA tst is painless, just a bucal swab. If in fact this is your husband's child, this woman took the high road, she could have made your life miserable, she could have received child support even though she went back to work.

[tinykim]

Actually I have never denied my children anything. They know of this possible child due to the fact that I felt that it was in their best interest not be kept in the dark just because their parents had issues. I made them aware of this many years ago. They have chosen not to take this any further because they say that their father never claimed paternity and never admitted to them that the child was his. They are all grown now and that is their right. Their father was a musician and we were used to "road ho's" making such claims, none of which went anywhere.

Yes, I finally vented after 20 years of not saying anything. It was not MY responsibility to do anything more than what I did. After I got over the original shock (and, quite frankly, it took several years to do so), I urged my husband to make contact with the child and mother to finally resolve the issue for the sake of the child. He chose not to because he didn't believe the baby was his. I don't know what verbal intercourse transpired between he and the woman, if any. We were separated for about 3 years before we divorced so he had plenty opportunity to step up to the plate.

As for the "high road", it is easy to do that when you are low enough to sleep with another woman's husband and purposely get pregnant. It was not the first time that she allegedly did such a thing and it wasn't the last. She has a whole slew of kids with different last names and no fathers onboard.

This is painful enough for me and I don't need others to lob bricks at my integrity. It is my duty to take care of MY children, not the issue of women with no morals. If she wanted to brand her child by giving it the last name of man who might never be in her or the child's life, that was her poor choice. And my ex was not any better - that's why I divorced his ass! And this woman did make my life miserable in a way - she slept with my husband AFTER I helped her once when she was down and out, giving her money to pay her rent because she already had ANOTHER young child and I didn't want to see any woman on the street in the winter. I barely knew her but she was a friend of my husband and I thought that I was doing the right thing. But, of course, she took the "high road"...... PUL - LEEZ!

If paternity can be established on such flimsy evidence with no proof of delivery of a court order, no wonder men are so bitter about the system. If there was a child-support order, shouldn't a levy have been placed against his tax refunds or his pay garnisheed? I though Cali was one of those states that takes your drivers license if you owe support. Why wouldn't she file for Social Security Death Benefits? Because of the "high road"? How did that benefit her child? Or was she embarrassed about having yet another baby with yet another last name that she tacked on it?

Yes, I have vented but have you finished being judgmental and self-righteous? I thank you for your assistance, however, if you can offer any more, please do so without attacking me. I am not the villain here - only a wife with a unfaithful ex-husband who could have chosen to either go with that woman or be man enough to take responsibility for his actions. I don't owe this woman or her child a damn thing. IF my ex-husband didn't do anything, I sure don't have to. My focus is MY children, born in a legal union. If it means that opening probate is also going to open a can of worms, then I will let sleeping dogs lie, for the sake of my 3 children. There's not THAT much money involved. I just thought that I would ask this forum.

Again, it is easy to take the high road when you have lived your life in the gutter. But, even then, she only made it to the curb!

[rmet4nzkx]

You and your family have continued this, which could have quickly been put to rest. Of course your exhusband was going to deny the child was his, that is SOP, the problems in not me being judgemental, it is the fact that if your son opens probate, he will be required to include this other child whether or not it in a biological sibling, since the time to disestablish paternity has long since passed. At least doing the DNA test would settle it in your own minds and give you some closure.

[aaron]

I'm a bit murky on whether the ex-husband actually admitted paternity, or took blood tests (short of DNA testing) to establish paternity. If this were just "somebody in another state putting his name on a birth certificate", it would be of limited significance - but it was more than that. It may be possible to disestablish paternity at least as far as the Georgia probate court is concerned, but that's something to discuss with a probate lawyer who can pull together the history of the paternity case.

[rmet4nzkx]

I'm a bit murky on whether the ex-husband actually admitted paternity, or took blood tests (short of DNA testing) to establish paternity. If this were just "somebody in another state putting his name on a birth certificate", it would be of limited significance - but it was more than that. It may be possible to disestablish paternity at least as far as the Georgia probate court is concerned, but that's something to discuss with a probate lawyer who can pull together the history of the paternity case.

Aaron, the child was born in CA, where 20 Years ago all that it took to establish paternity was the name put on the BC and a letter sent out by DCSS, ignoring the letter established paternity by default whether or not any child support was ever ordered or collected, there is a 2 year limit to disestbalish paternity after the notice, there were not AOP or DNA then. This is an example that couldbe fought with the Navarro case law IF dad was alive, now it is an estate issue.

[aaron]

It still may be an issue which can be fought in a Georgia probate court.

[rmet4nzkx]

It still may be an issue which can be fought in a Georgia probate court.

No doubt a probate issue, but paternity is a CA issue for a child born in CA.