Preventing a Paternity Test in Florida

afraid2ask · #1 10-24-2006, 07:52 AM

Hello all - I'm brand new here. I am pregnant and living in FL and I'm not 100% sure who the father is. I very much want to raise this baby on my own - I do not want the father involved whatsoever. But, I have a psycho ex bf who assumes he is the father and wats to be involved - and he's said he plans to get a paternity test done. My question is: If I get married to someone (even though it may be just a "paper marriage") (to a guy who is willing to be the presumed father) before my baby is born - will this prevent this psycho ex from being able to obtain a paternity test??? I thought there was some law in FL about not being allowed to interfere with the sanctity of a marriage... Please advise! Thanks.

rmet4nzkx · #2 10-24-2006, 09:20 AM

Quoting afraid2ask

Hello all - I'm brand new here. I am pregnant and living in FL and I'm not 100% sure who the father is. I very much want to raise this baby on my own - I do not want the father involved whatsoever. But, I have a psycho ex bf who assumes he is the father and wats to be involved - and he's said he plans to get a paternity test done. My question is: If I get married to someone (even though it may be just a "paper marriage") (to a guy who is willing to be the presumed father) before my baby is born - will this prevent this psycho ex from being able to obtain a paternity test??? I thought there was some law in FL about not being allowed to interfere with the sanctity of a marriage... Please advise! Thanks.

Is this psycho ex bf the father of your child? Either parent can petition the court to establish paternity, whether or not you are married at the time of the birth, your marriage could complicate the matter more and cost you more money to fight it, but then a judge will decide the parentage of the child. If this man is not the biological father of the child, then you will have an easier fight, but if he is, the judge will order child support and he will be able to file for custody and visitation. If you did not want your child to have a father, why didn't you pick one that wasn't a "Psycho" from a sperm bank? Then you could have proven he had no standing and you wouldn't have to worry about your child having a relationship with their father..

afraid2ask · #3 10-24-2006, 03:47 PM

Thanks for the reply. I'm really not sure who the father is. I found a willing "donor" who I hope if the father, but there is a small chance that this psycho ex may be the father.

So, in your opinion, even if I found a willing guy to marry me on paper - wouldn't I be able to throw out of court psycho's petition for paternity based on me being married and my baby being presumed to be my husband's???

Obviously, if me getting married won't make a difference, then I won't do it. But I'm desperate at this point!

rmet4nzkx · #4 10-24-2006, 05:07 PM

Again, if all you wanted was to be a single mother with no support, custody or visitation issues with any man, then you should have obtained sperm at a sperm banck or through a fertility clinic where you would have no legal issues. You don't know who the father is and now you will have to deal with that issue, sorry thing, your child is the loser here.

kqp1978 · #5 10-31-2006, 10:21 PM

I think you need to realize how incredibly selfish you are acting. If your "psycho" ex is proven to be the biological father of your unborn child, then he has a right to form a relationship with HIS child. Similiarly, your child has a right to know BOTH of his/her parents, regardless of what you may think of your ex.

Let's put the shoe on the other foot: suppose your ex tells you that he's delighted to be a father, but that he does not want you to be involved in his child's life b/c you're a "psycho." So after you deliver, he'll take complete responsibility for the child and you can go on your merry way, have a nice day, and he will not allow you to ever see your child again. Pretty crazy scenario, I know, but don't think that you have more rights to a child simply because it popped out of your birth canal. Assuming he's the father, he has every right to file to establish paternity and parental rights and responsibilities, and your child has a right to have both parents involved in his/her life.

You may wish to consider the moral implications of lying to a child about something so fundamentally important as his identity, and deliberately preventing him from having a relationship with his/her father. You may also wish to consider how that child will react when he learns the truth, and how this will affect your relationship with the child. Kids do have a way of finding out the truth about their parentage, whether at 10, 15, 0r 50 years of age.

You need to do some serious thinking about the consequences of what you're proposing!