Ex Moved Out - Took My Stuff

[49er]

My question involves a relationship in the state of: PA

OK.

My ex-g/f and I broke up about 2 months ago because I found out that she is a sociopath (legit - not saying that because I am upset at what she did to me). We have a lease together in the apartment I am currently in that ends in September (end of month).

On Saturday, I came home from work to find that she had moved not only her furniture out, but also a lot of my stuff. Some of the more valuable belongings would be a $200 vacuum that I purchased, roughly $400 in cooking ware, about $200 in dining ware, $180 headphones, and a whole bunch of other little things - a lot of it seems to have been done out of spite (like taking my pillow and leaving a mess everywhere).

Naturally, I was pissed when I saw what had happened and after calling my family and the police, I tried calling her phone. The number was no longer in service.

Now, while I do not have receipts for many (or maybe all of the items that have been stolen), some of the items were gifts from family to me for my birthday and Christmas. I also have some texts from her from about a month ago asking how much I would want for some of the items that she ended up taking without my knowledge or consent.

The police were of no help due to the fact that they said that it was a civil issue and I would have to take it up with the Magistrate. One of the officers told me that sometimes it's easier to take it as a "life lesson" than go through the whole process and possibly coming up empty-handed.

I am not naive. I know that I will not be able to get it all back, but like I said earlier, some of those things were gifts specifically to me.

Am I out of luck here or what? It seems like people find themselves at a loss because there isn't a whole lot that can be done when something like this is done to us... Also, what is going to happen with the lease? I've notified that landlord and told him that she up and left with no forwarding address and no phone number. He said we will see what happens when the end of the month rolls around and the rent is due. I told him pointedly that I cannot afford to pay it on my own because the girl I lived with amassed a good amount of debt in my name because she lied about having cancer and I was trying to help with things when she "couldn't work."

It does seem like nice guys finish last at the end of the day!

[aardvarc]

Am I out of luck here or what?

Your option, as police told you, is to sue her in civil court for the value of the items you can convince the court were yours. How successful you'll be will depend on how well you can substantiate the specific items and ownership thereof.

I told him pointedly that I cannot afford to pay it on my own because the girl I lived with amassed a good amount of debt in my name because she lied about having cancer and I was trying to help with things when she "couldn't work."

That's the risk you take when spending money on or with someone you're not married to. By not being married, you do not have access to the process of divorce. In addition to suing for the value of missing items, you can attempt to sue for debt that you can prove was reasonably hers and hers alone (such as medical bills), or, where you can show a court that there was some contract or agreement for repayment. Without showing that, the judge is going to tell you that living AS IF married, without actually BEING married, doesn't carry the same legal protections for assets/liabilities incurred in a relationship. Nice guys finish last when they fail to protect themselves with either provable promises to repay, or a wedding ring.