16 Year Old Wanting to Have Custody of Herself Transfered to Friend

**IowaGirl96** · 06-29-2012, 07:14 AM

My question involves guardianship in the State of Iowa:

I am 16 and live in iowa. my parents and I fight constantely and im am so close to my breaking point with them and with living with them. i sometimes spend weekends with a former boss and family friend and her boyfriend at their home a little ways away. they have told me that they want to help me get out of my parent's house and want to be gaurdians of me so that i am in a better place and can rest easier not having to deal with the fighting. they can support me and everything, but we dont know how or what we have to do for me to be able to be with them. we also do not know if my parents will willingly let me go, but it is better for me to be out of my parent's house.

I need advice/help on what i have to do and what they have to do so that i can move out and move in with them legally and also how they can become my gaudians.

**cbg** · 06-29-2012, 07:23 AM

Unless you have your parents' permission for this, it isn't going to happen. All teens fight with their parents - the court is not going to see that as a valid reason to give guardianship of you to someone else.

**IowaGirl96** · 06-29-2012, 07:32 AM

I pay for my clothes, school stuff, phone, gas in my car, and anything else I need. They are trying to stop me from getting a job as well and i must have a job to live off of. My life here is horrible and has been for years and I need to be out of this house.

**LawResearcherMissy** · 06-29-2012, 07:42 AM

I pay for my clothes, school stuff, phone, gas in my car, and anything else I need. They are trying to stop me from getting a job as well

How do you pay for that without a job?

My life here is horrible

Sure it is. You've got a car you only buy gas for, and an internet connection and computer to bitch to strangers about how much your parents suck.

Are you being beaten? Starved? Sexually abused? Do you live in filth and squalor? No? Then quit stomping your little feet and acting like the sun should rise and set on you, grow a little perspective, and get over yourself.

**cbg** · 06-29-2012, 07:48 AM

That doesn't change anything. You have not provided one WORD to suggest that a court would find that your parents should have you removed from their care. If your parents allow you to move in with your friend, you can; if they will not, you can't. You have not provided one single iota of a suggestion that a court would find reason to overrule them on that.

**IowaGirl96** · 06-29-2012, 05:10 PM

i babysit and also the people that are helping me out and wanting me to stay with them is how i pay for things.
as for my car, I have to pay the insurance at the end of the year and i am to start paying my father for my car. I also help pay for internet every month and paid for the wireless router and my grandfather bought a laptop for me to use for now.
i am not allowed to do hardly anything here and basically am a maid to everyone as well.

**cdwjava** · 06-29-2012, 05:22 PM

So far, you have still said nothing that will compel a court to deprive your parents of their legal right to raise their child. Your complaints are similar to probably 75% of the teenagers in this country - certainly very similar to what MINE have said, and I have one pre-teen and three teenage boys ('scuse me, "young men") living under my roof. It was only a few hours ago that I heard the "servant" comment from a 16 year old, and a complaint that I dared to ask that he pay for his own gas as he is driving around visiting his friends!

The bottom line is that you are NOT going to be able to go live with your friends unless mom and dad agree to permit it.

Take a look at the legal requirements for emancipation then ask yourself if you can possibly qualify:

232C.1 EMANCIPATION PETITION -- HEARING.
1. A minor who desires to become emancipated may file a petition
for an order of emancipation in juvenile court if all of the
following apply:
a. The minor is sixteen years of age or older.
b. The minor is a resident of this state.
c. The minor is not in the care, custody, or control of the
state.
2. A petition filed pursuant to this section shall contain the
following:
a. The petitioner's name, mailing address, and date of birth.

b. The name and mailing address of the petitioner's parents
or legal guardian.
c. Specific facts to support the petition including but not
limited to the following:
(1) The minor has demonstrated financial self-sufficiency,
including proof of employment or other means of support, which does
not include assistance or subsidies from a federal, state, or local
governmental agency.
(2) The minor has demonstrated an ability to manage the personal
affairs of the minor.
(3) The minor has demonstrated an ability and commitment to
obtain and maintain education, vocational training, or employment.
(4) Any other information considered necessary to support the
petition.
d. Any one of the following:
(1) Documentation that the minor has been living on the minor's
own for at least three consecutive months.
(2) A statement explaining the reasons the minor believes the
home of the minor's parents or legal guardian is not a healthy or
safe environment.
(3) A notarized statement that contains written consent to
emancipation by the minor's parents or legal guardian.
3. The court shall hold a hearing on the petition within ninety
days of the filing of the petition. Notice of the hearing, with a
copy of the petition attached, shall be served by personal service on
the minor's parent or legal guardian at least thirty days prior to
the hearing date. Any other parties shall be notified as provided by
the rules of civil procedure for service of an original notice.
4. The minor may participate in the court proceedings on the
minor's own behalf, or may be represented by the minor's own counsel,
or the court may appoint a guardian ad litem on behalf of the minor.

From what you have written, you do not yet meet the state's minimum requirements for emancipation. So, you tough it out until you are 18 or work to try and make things better.

**PandorasBox** · 07-01-2012, 07:19 AM

When I was your age, the only way I got out was this:

(A) I went to live with my grandparents. And yes, I'm the one who asked them if I could come live there.
(B) My mom and dad both signed legal paperwork to make my grandparents my legal guardians.
(C) If my mom had not signed paperwork, there was enough stuff going on that yes, a judge would have ruled that my decision to move in with my grandparents was, in fact, in my best interest. If my father tried to get custody, there was enough there, too.

My friend did get emancipated. Her family had a lot of issues, including her father going to prison for raping her repeatedly over the years. She was able to support herself; her mother gave her approval; and she worked while studying for her GED. Get how serious her situation was vs arguing with the parents?