Disagreement Over Child's Psychiatric Diagnosis and Treatment

[MichiganMom]

My question involves child abuse or neglect in the State of: Michigan

My child was recently diagnosed with a disorder the requires existing symptoms from early childhood. The child's other parent has been actively trying to prevent this diagnosis by lying about the duration of his symptoms, to, in fact blame me for a diagnosis that is similar, to take custody of the children. The diagnosis easily mimics depression to a person who is untrained in my son's actual diagnosis. Underweight, No friends, or attempts to make friends, lack of eye contact, lack of communication are all common symptoms of this diagnosis. My son's father attempted to use his symptoms and claimed they began because of me (when in fact his diagnosis proves that they did not), simply to take custody and prove me a unfit mother.

I also have proof (depending on how it is perceived) that the father made up, and lied about "suicide attempts" by my son, to further his claim of a depression diagnosis.

His diagnosis has been delayed 3 years now, and proof of a delay because of my ex's actions for 2 years now. My son should have been getting treatments related to his diagnosis long ago.

Suddenly with the diagnosis (only a couple of months ago) my ex has proclaimed that he always knew my son had this disorder, but he decided what treatment to pursue (depression) because it was more evident. For the record, even though my ex stated my son was diagnosed with severe depression in court papers (Which resulted in a temporary parenting time, that still almost 2 years later has not been resolved and profoundly restricts my contact with my children) There is no evidence anywhere that he was diagnosed with any form of depression. Instead he has been diagnosed in the past with adjustment disorder.

The referee at the FOC would not even let me comment, or present proof to dispute what my ex claimed.

Also, I found out that the paternal grandparents have been calling one son in particular names (like fat and ugly), insulting his eating habits, pushing him off of a chair, and throwing things at him. I called CPS when I found this out, but there wasn't enough proof to pursue. I have since found out that my 13 year old still runs around the grandparents home (where they spend the majority of their time) in his underwear. And 2 of the children (ages 6 (girl) and 8 (boy)) still sleep in their father's bed, even though I have persisted that this change.

The children have also told me that they are scared a lot, because of the near constant yelling of his grandparents and their father. That the grandfather has chased them, and hit them with a belt. That the father has pushed and shoved my son with the disorder into a wall when he became frustrated at my son's efforts with his homework (which is related to his diagnosis).

What can I do?

[Dogmatique]

What is your goal?

[MichiganMom]

I thought it was quite obvious what my goal is.

The grandparents need restricted contact with my children. I've lost my children because of the father's lies about my son.
My son needs treatment and therapies, but the father continues, and will continue to cause issues with this.

[Dogmatique]

If it was quite obvious I wouldn't have asked the question.

I see no reason why the grandparents should be restricted, in all honesty. Why? Because CPS have investigated and found nothing wrong.

Also, your parenting expectations and those of Dad don't have to agree; if he's fine with the 13 year running around in boxers all day, that's fine. If he's fine with the two younger kids sleeping with him, it's a non-issue.

You cannot dictate how he parents the kids during his parenting time.

If you feel that you have a change of circumstance or that the children are at risk, by all means speak with an attorney and/or contact child services.

[MichiganMom]

I see I left out the issues with the grandparents. One of my sons was teased by the grandparents, which in turn led to the other children teasing him because of his weight. He was a little bigger than the rest of the children.
He told me that his grandmother calls him fat, ugly, has pushed him off a chair into the floor, thrown things and hit him with them (hairbrush).
His grandfather has validated another son for calling the first one stupid (agreeing with his statements), and has told him he eats like a pig.

The other children in seeing the name calling, did this as well, and instead of telling them it was wrong, it was validated by the grandparents.

[aaron]

If you believe you have grounds to take the issue back to court and have the court restrict the amount or nature of access your ex- gives to his parents, file a motion with the custody court. I suggest that you retain a lawyer.