How to Prepare for Court

[DamonWilliams]

My question involves protection orders in the State of: Washington

I filed a protection order yesterday against a woman I had a week and half relationship with.

She was stalking and harassing me for over a week from the last time we saw each other in person. Including coming by my house when I was not home and leaving photographs of herself, and other items, in my mailbox.

Constantly sending me text messages, and occasionally calling and leaving voice mails.

I could deal with the texts and phone calls, which I never returned. And I figured she would eventually leave me alone. However, once it became clear she was coming to my house and items started to show up in my mailbox, that is when I knew I had a real problem on my hands.

So two nights ago, I filed a police report just to get a paper trail started. Not at that point ready to have the police talk to her. But the barrage of texts kept coming and coming. So I finally responded back with to not text me, not to call me, and not come to the house. And that it was over.

That did not stop her. Just gave her fuel for her fire. 13 more texts and a phone call came from her all through the night and into the morning and afternoon. Finally, she sent one which was a threat. Then I moved forward with getting a protection order served to her.

So my question is, how do I prepare for the court date coming up in a couple of weeks? I cannot export the text messages off of my phone. I have called both AT&T, and Nokia and both have told me it is not possible at this time with the model of phone I have.

If the proof of harassment cannot be presented as evidence, what can I do? The texts also incriminate her with leaving things in my mailbox. Plus the threat to me. I cannot imagine a judge willing to look at my phone and its contents...

Thanks,

[Dogmatique]

To recap:

After you told her to stop contact, you received only 13 texts and one more phone call. Correct?

What was the threat, exactly?

[DamonWilliams]

I know it might sound silly, but it was, "And by the way, it is not over, you are over..." Both the police and courthouse clerk said that alone was enough to get the order put in place.

That by itself is not might not mean much to you, but you've never met this woman... She also stated in person that last time I spoke with her she was going to cut me up, chop me into a million pieces, and put me in a frying pan if I were ever with another woman. And she also told me she was going to drug me, kidnap and rape me since I did not want to sleep with her that night.

The thirteen texts from her were all very psychotic. Everyone I know that I've shown the messages of what I got from her were blown away and said I'm living a Lifetime TV movie...

Actually, just about every text I got from her was psychotic which I why I tried to run for the hills away from this nutcase.

[Dogmatique]

Nope, never met the woman.

I do however have extensive knowledge and experience of how restraining orders and anti-harassment orders work in the state of WA.

You can ask that the judge look at your phone. But are you able to prove she actually sent the texts? Given that numbers are so easily spoofed these days I'm not sure that will matter for much. And you'll generally have to convince the court that these are actually serious threats and not just the hyperbolic ramblings of a woman who just got dumped.

At best I can see a short-term order in place. If she doesn't turn up, your chances are likely a little higher.

[DamonWilliams]

I'm not sure it will take much to convince the judge.

This woman has a rap sheet, which the clerk alerted me to... Said I needed to check the open cases on her. She was arrested a month or so ago for vehicular assault.. against her own mother.

Oh, I forgot to add. It is as clear as day she sent these texts to me. Because she took about eight pictures of herself with her camera phone and sent them to me... Through last night..

[Dogmatique]

What she did to other people honestly isn't going to matter a whole bunch.

Look - I know what you're getting at. It's clear to you, that she authored the texts. But can you show that I didn't simply have an old phone of hers and forward the pics and some texts to you? Or that you didn't spoof the number yourself and did the same thing yourself?

I do wish you luck, because I do know there are just some honestly loopy people out there. But for the most part, they tend to go away once you show that you're not interested. While it's true that the court will often err on the side of caution, ask yourself this:

If she's intent on harming you, do you seriously think a piece of paper is going to stop her?

I'm not saying you shouldn't go ahead, because if you genuinely feel she's a threat (and again, the mad ramblings of a lunatic you dumped two weeks ago don't necessarily equate to a credible threat) you have the right (if not the obligation) to act. But just don't expect the moon, k?

[DamonWilliams]

I totally understand your point. And had severe reservations about even going through with the protection order. But when 10 people, who know of the situation, urge me that I had to do this - I listened.

I'm fully aware that a piece of paper is not going to stop a lunatic. And a lunatic she is...

Seriously though, her prior history would have no bearing on what the judge would decide to do? That does not make sense to me. Especially if she has a history of causing harm to people...

[Dogmatique]

She has arrests.

How many convictions? How many are recent? What are the convictions for?

[DamonWilliams]

She has at least one arrest: for the vehicular assault. There are a total of 14 court records for her including the one I have against her.

The date range is from December of 2004 to yesterday. On average, almost one every six months. As far as convictions, I have no clue. I would bet none. And that is just from one of the limited things I know about her and one of the things she stated that she, "never gets in any real trouble, because she knows the right people".

She told me about the incident with her mother, and stated the mom dropped the charges.

Honestly, I'm probably not going to take any time off from work to request the full court records for her cases. Although I probably should to just to know what this stupid lunatic is really all about.

Wish I never would have met this psycho...

[Dogmatique]

(small hint - WA has virtually every unsealed/expunged record online. I use the system frequently. Google "Washington state court records")

Arrests are honestly more or less meaningless. Any person can make an accusation against anyone else (particularly if there's a domestic dispute), and it doesn't necessarily take physical proof for the court to issue a warrant for that arrest.

Convictions are what matter. And anything prior to about 3 months before you two hooked up? Not going to matter at all. You are, as an adult, expected to practice due diligence when it comes to selecting a mate. The court will not necessarily agree that she's the stupid lunatic.

I'm honestly not trying to be harsh, but you have to own your place in this mess too.