Do You Have to Respond to FL-145 Form Interrogatories

[aldente]

My question involves a marriage in the state of: California

I am the petitioner in a modification/move away case. My "ex" and I were never married, never in a relationship. We are in a custody battle and she clearly sees a free paycheck as motivation over the well being of our daughter, which I am fighting for. We presently have 50/50 joint custody but she wants 100% since I am moving due to job relocation.
I was recently served FL-145 Form Interrogatories with every box checked. Do I have to provide all of this information? My concern is that I had a restraining order against her for threatening my life in the past, it expired late last year. I wish to renew it. I have enjoyed relative freedom, enjoy my privacy and really do not feel comfortable providing all of this information about my personal life, my wife and other children given her threats before, and her/families abilities. Is there any way to object and not suffer court penalties?

Procedural concerns: The request is extremely broad. Do I have an objection?
FL-142 response form was not included, does this violate procedure?


Thank you.

[Mr. Knowitall]

The instructions are right there on the first page of the interrogatories. There's no "My ex- once threatened me" exception to documenting your ability to support your child.

If you believe that you would be endangered by some of the disclosure, bring an appropriate motion for a protective order with the court - perhaps the court will permit you to submit certain information for in camera review rather than turning it over to the adverse party. As you haven't explained how you would be endangered by the disclosure, we're not in a position to comment on what might happen.

[aardvarc]

My concern is that I had a restraining order against her for threatening my life in the past, it expired late last year. I wish to renew it.

Problem is that if you didn't seek to renew it BEFORE if expired, it's a done deal now. You're going to need to ask for a NEW order, based on NEW circumstances. Orders don't get re-upped once they expire.

[aldente]

The instructions are right there on the first page of the interrogatories. There's no "My ex- once threatened me" exception to documenting your ability to support your child.

Speaking of which, is it proper procedure for me (petitioner) to receive the interrogatories while there is still a 50/50 order in place?
A lot of these questions seem to indicate that we were married (question about community property etc), but there was never a relationship.
thanks for your replies!

[tex11]

You MUST answer the questions on FL-145.

The fact you have 50/50 custody order does NOT relieve you of the obligation to respond.

Since this interrogatory form is pre-approved by the CA Judicial Council, it is highly unlikely you are in a position to object to any of these, especially if you are asserting they are overbroad. You may have room for limited objections in your type of case, but not a heck of a lot. You may be able to dodge submitting to her an FL-142 (even if temporarily) because she did not send you a copy, but that does not relieve you of the requirement to duly respond to FL-145. The form is pretty clear on how to respond.

But in these cases what is good for the goose is good for the gander. You can serve her the same discovery requests.

The restraining order expired and you will have to start from scratch to get another one. Waiting to do so until after you filed a Petition for modification of custody will probably do you more harm than good if it is denied, and it will most likely be denied.

Being evasive or failing to properly answer discovery will also weigh against you in court.

What are you asking for in the Petition you filed?

Do you currently have 50/50 physical custody?

Since mom does have 50/50 custody, the legal presumption is she is a fit parent, and that at the time the order was rendered, 50/50 was in the child's best interests. 50/50 works best when both parents can work reasonably well together for the child, and they do not live too far apart.

YOU are the one who is relocating. That, combined with the fact you are clearly NOT working well together in raising your child, is more than enough of a change in circumstances to warrant a review of the current custody arrangement, and a change if necessary.

Given you are the one relocating, arguing that the mother is only driven by money in seeking to be the primary custodial parent won't fly well in court.

[aardvarc]

Given you are the one relocating, arguing that the mother is only driven by money in seeking to be the primary custodial parent won't fly well in court.

This is especially true when you TOO are motivated by money - since by your own statement, you are relocating due to employment (there can be lots of reasons to move...but the court is smart enough to know that employment is how you get your MONEY). You can't have your cake and eat it too. BOTH of you are motivated by money. You are creating a distance between yourself and your child. Mom is apparantly trying to argue that this distance isn't conducive to 50/50 custody, and unless the distance is tiny, such that your ability to remain as meaningfully involved won't suffer, this may be reasonable. The burden will be on you to convince the court that you can be as interactive and as effective as a parent in spite of the distance you're creating (translation: are you gonna be doing a lot of traveling to remain as active in the child's life after the move? if your face to face time with the child is going to suffer, so is the 50/50 status, and mom is more likely to prevail).

[aldente]

Thanks for your reply.
To answer questions:


What are you asking for in the Petition you filed?
My petition is to modify existing 50/50 joint and seeking move away order as I am moving to Oregon due to job transfer. It's a stable position but the office in Oregon has more opportunity for me to continue to grow, and more long term stability.

Do you currently have 50/50 physical custody?
Yes, since my daughter was almost 1. She will be turning 6 in November. Her mom and I had a disagreement about who would school her. My wife and I already had her in home schooling and social activities when her mom approached me saying she had enrolled her in school and that I would see her only one weekend per month. My daughter and I have a huge bond and this didn't sit well with me. I also felt it would impact my daughter as the status quo has always been 50/50, and when with me, wife and 4 other siblings she is very happy. When with her mom, she is usually with the maternal grandparents as her mom bounced between relationships, moving and has an older daughter to take care of.
So I proposed mediation, she retained an attorney, I filed OSC, we did mediation and settlement conference and now here we are.


Since mom does have 50/50 custody, the legal presumption is she is a fit parent, and that at the time the order was rendered, 50/50 was in the child's best interests. 50/50 works best when both parents can work reasonably well together for the child, and they do not live too far apart.


YOU are the one who is relocating. That, combined with the fact you are clearly NOT working well together in raising your child, is more than enough of a change in circumstances to warrant a review of the current custody arrangement, and a change if necessary.

Given you are the one relocating, arguing that the mother is only driven by money in seeking to be the primary custodial parent won't fly well in court.

Thanks for your input, much appreciated! My primary concern is this: her license is revoked and so she cannot drive legally and therefore can't get insurance, she only works 2 days a week and can't afford to raise the two girls (per her statements), she's bouncing around relationships and on two occasions has been investigated by DCFS (no fault of my own). In retaliation, she bribed my daughter to lie to police stating we abused her, and my daughter confessed this to DCFS. Also, my daughter knows I am moving, her mommy told her and she was in tears when she asked me. she told me it makes her sad, and she wants to be with me and mama (her step mom who has accepted, provided for and bonded with her since a baby). when I asked her why she said "because you spend time with me and you don't let anyone to hurt me". she's very intelligent, knows what she wants and I hope this matters. Also, where I am relocating the schools are better, the crime is lower and she will have many more opportunities than she will living in South LA (not snubbing South Central LA, or people who live there but my personal experience and what I have personally witnessed tells me that if a child has the opportunity to live better, experience more, and get out of South Central/Watts, they can learn and possibly achieve more in life- not that the judge will even care, but this is a small part of my personal testimony). A generational "curse"? I don't know, but I was similarly in my daughter's shoes. The oldest child of 4 in a broken marriage, a mother who wanted to scheme and run the streets, and father who cared, but a judge who apparently did not. Mother got full custody, father paid about 1500/mo for the longest and our quality of life never changed. When I was 15, I couldn't tolerate another boyfriend beating me or my siblings and ran away. I met my "plus mom" through a friend in school who cared about me, took me in and was a mother to me. I stopped my bad ways, habits and negative associations because I had love in the home for the first time. I got to travel to other states, and even another country (Israel), and didn't have a relationship with my bio mom until 19, much to my detriment. A good household (not a perfect one, but much better than what I had) CHANGED my life. My peers from the old "hood" I hear are mostly dead, in jail, and two of them from decent homes made something of themselves. I'm not bragging. I'm not well off, I'm not rich, but I provide for my wife and kids and I'm better than I could have been had I not ended up in a different home. I just want the best for our daughter and want to give it my best shot. I am not proposing 100%, just that I have her for school and send her back on summers and winters to be with mom. thanks for reading if you got this far. sorry for the novel.

- - - Updated - - -

There's some truth to this Catherine, I am motivated by money, but also motivated to provide a better life for my family.
It's not my intention to create distance. I have a wife and 4 other children to support and California isn't the best place to do it. We are in a depression and who knows what will happen in the coming years. If I have the opportunity to further grow and secure a more stable position crucial to the company I'm working for, I have to take it. I also have family in the state that I am moving to, including the foster mom who took me in as a child and she is quite close to all my children, including the minor involved in this case.