My husband is the custodial parent of his two young kids here in IL; the ex lives in FL and only sees them about 3 times a year. She calls somewhat regularly during the week to talk to the kids, which was at our insistence. She is now calling my boss (my husband and I are both military, ex-wife is civilian and her new husband is military), and saying that I am talking badly about her in the background while she is talking to her kids, etc.
My question is this: Is she allowed to repeatedly call my workplace and directly make accusations and comments about me; doesn't that constitute defamation of character or slander? I don't believe that if I was a civilian, that that would be tolerated by the employer, and I'm not sure why my chain of command is allowing it. I assume that if she does have issue with me that she should take it up with my husband, or her lawyer, or at the worst, my husband's chain of command. I, as the stepmother, have absolutely no legal rights or say regarding the kids, so why is she able to slander me while I raise her children for her?
Base legal will not give me any advice other than "consult an attorney", but my husband and I have already been robbed by one recently, so I balk at the idea of shelling out more money so soon.
Thank you in advance for your time.