Ex Will Not Pay and Courts Have Done Nothing

[worriedmommy]

My question involves child support in the State of: TX

Ex had not paid any support for 2 years and since June of 2011 has only paid $60 a month when he wants to that is. I have sole custody of our 6 year old daughter since she was 2. Ex owes over 16k in arrears. The state has filed on him for non payment a year ago. The judge keeps putting off making a judgement on him for non payment. The last time we was in court she said she cant make us but would like to see us mediate on the child support also. What does that mean?? Let him off?? I dont understand!!! I provide everything for my daughter finicially... doctor visits, co pays, health insurance premiums, all out of pocket medical, school clothes and supplies, after school care, summer child care, food, shelter, everything! He is ordered to pay $450 a month plus and extra $100 for back pay, and 50% of health premiums and out of pocket costs. He "lost" his job back in Sept 09. State filed on him March 2011. He then filed for full custody ( making me jump through all kinds of hoops) later in 2011 he files for ssdi/ssi. He says that he is still in the application process but according to the information he provided he has already been denied and is in the appeals process.

Me and daughter live out of state and I am proposing letting him pay no child support as long as he provides transportation to and from for all of his visits, but want payments of $100 a month for arrears. The amicus attorney does not like this idea. I am so confused on what to do Im going to loose my mind!!! On top of that when he gets her he buys her what ever she wants, even moved to a bigger house to please her because she said that mommies house is bigger. He even bought two vehicles one of which is brand new!! Where is he getting all this money!!??? I mean I am glad they are spending time together but come on now!

[Mr. Knowitall]

The last time we was in court she said she cant make us but would like to see us mediate on the child support also. What does that mean?

You would need to ask the judge what issues she believes might be resolved through mediation.

He "lost" his job back in Sept 09. State filed on him March 2011.

Presumably that's why they're not putting him in jail for the arrearage - that he's convinced the court that he's chronically unemployed in a bad economy and that he's making a good faith effort to find work.

He then filed for full custody ( making me jump through all kinds of hoops) later in 2011 he files for ssdi/ssi.

If he's disabled from work, that would be another potential factor in why he's not incarcerated for his arrears.

Me and daughter live out of state and I am proposing letting him pay no child support as long as he provides transportation to and from for all of his visits, but want payments of $100 a month for arrears. The amicus attorney does not like this idea.

If he has no money, he has no money - you can't get blood from a stone. If the idea here is that as he can't afford support you'll set up a deal that effectively cuts off his visitation, that would presumably be why the amicus attorney objects.

Where is he getting all this money!!?

We would have no way of knowing. Has he, for example, remarried? Is he getting help from his family?

[worriedmommy]

I propose him providing all transportation because of the following facts:

1. He currently provides 2 and sometimes 3 round trips from TX to LA for visits and I the same. (he picks up at begining of visit and I pick up at the end)

2. 2 and 3 trips per month during the school year is too much on my daughter, this is also agreed upon by the amicus attorneys should be reduced to once a month. Before the state filed on him he didnt exersize his visit until the state filed on him for arrears.

3. If this is happens he would make less trips if he provided transportation both ways one visit a month vs 2 to 3 visits per month one way. So Im not asking for more than he is currently providing.

4. He pays $60 a month in child support so $100 towards arrears is only asking for $40 more a month.

The amicus attorneys have expressed for me that they do not want me to give up the $450 in child support or the 16k he owes in arrears.

And yes I believe his family is helping him. He also lives with his gf of since before our divorce in 06.

He applied for ssi/ssdi in 2011 and was denied and is now in the appeals process. He has admitted that he can work a part time job but hasnt gotten one.