Mother Wants to Change Child's Last Name Against Father's Wishes

[agriffin63080]

My question involves child support in the State of: Missouri Not sure if this is the right spot but i Me and my ex was never married and had our son five years ago i am on the birth cir. and everything i got a court order to go to court for a name change for my son i dont know the first steps about this and i dont want his last named changed at ALL. In the paper work it said something about for the better sake of the child like what does that mean i never been in trouble and my family dont have a bad last name. My ? is can she do this without my permission in any way. ive been told she cant do it without my permission can thecourts force me to say yes or is there a law about doing it if i was not in his life for a little bit and trust me i wantedto be its just that his other grandparents made it so hard and always some excuse why i couldnt see him. PLease please please any advice would be helpful

[Dogmatique]

It probably says "best interest" or words to that effect.

How often have you seen your son in the past 5 years?

Do you see him often now?

[agriffin63080]

Yes thats what it says. Last time i seen him was about 5 mo ago and everytime i try to set something up they always tell me not this weekend maybe next over and over and over BTW i do pay child support but got a little behind last year then started working and got laid off agian in Dec so im falling behind agian

??????????????????????

[Dogmatique]

Okay, so you need to respond to the summons. Since you're not really an active part of your son's life, Mom has at least a decent chance of getting the name change. At the very least, the court will likely order a hyphenated name.

[agriffin63080]

What do you mean respond to it Like show up for the court date? and Hyphenated im confused sorry and me not being active enough is not my fault

[Dogmatique]

Yes, you need to show up.

Hyphenated means "Your last name-Mom's last name". Like Smith-Jones, for example.

You not being active...seriously, if you haven't pursued visitation (and by that I mean turn up to get your child per your court order and file contempt if Mom won't turn over the child), that is actually your fault.


Do you have a court order for visitation?

[agriffin63080]

Ya i understand i did not try my best. But yes i do like 3-4 hours every other week supervised by her parents which is not right. And i dont want to go through them i want to start dealing with the mother i have not even talked to her in like 4 years

[Dogmatique]

Then you've gotta own it, Dad - you're CHOOSING not to see your child.

That's on you.

But yes - Mom has at least a chance of successfully changing your child's name, since you're not a part of the child's life.

Why is your visitation supervised, btw? How many times have you actually seen your child in say...the last 3 years?

[agriffin63080]

Well when we went to court years ago i could not afford a lawyer and did not no what the hell was going on so her mom spoke up and told i guess her lawyer that she wanted me supervised for what reason i dont know i have never been in trouble for anything put it this way our son is not even wit hthe mom half the time our son is at her moms house all the time they pretty much took over the whole thing and i have seen my son at least 4 times a mo in the past 3 years we have done stuff together its just a drag because her mom is right there with me its kinda awkword

[Dogmatique]

Okay, so go back to court and get the parenting order changed.