Child's Name Ex-Husband

[Slattery]

My ex and I split up soon after child was born. Her idea, not mine. We never got married.

She used to be married, now divorced. No kids from the marriage. She was married less than three years and she kept ex-husband's last name after divorcing.

She now wants our child to have her last name only (which is really her married name). She doesn't want child to have my last name at all even though I want the child to have dad's last name. But she won't agree. She says it's much better to have her name. I said it will confuse the child. The child is already with me a lot of the time and I plan to raise the child equally.

This sounds crazy to me. Most people I've asked think it's pretty crazy too. She told me that because we were never married she has the right to do as she pleases.

Is this pretty normal now? Do judges back it up in a case like this where there was no marriage?

Thank you.

[Dogmatique]

Please tell us where you're located

[Slattery]

Indiana. Does this question vary from state to state? I didn't know.

[LawResearcherMissy]

Are you the legal father? In other words, are you on the birth certificate, or has paternity been otherwise legally established?

[Slattery]

Yes. I'm the legal father and my name is on the birth certificate as the father. Paternity has been established; I acknowledged paternity. My paternity is not in question.

[Dogmatique]

(Yes, the laws vary greatly by state)

Mom will have to serve you notice of the name change petition; you can then object in court. If you do object, Mom will likely have to be happy with kiddo having a hyphenated last name (if it's changed at all).

[Slattery]

I was unclear on one point. When baby was born, mom waited until father (me) was out of the hospital room, then signed a birth document with the last name that she wanted--hers (her married name). I asked her why she did this and she told me they were pressuring her to sign the document. Before she acted in this manner, we actually had agreed on a hyphenate.

The form that she submitted was the form for an unwed mother and this effectively prevented me from putting my name on the birth certificate. So while I have acknowledged paternity, I now realize that the way she acted means my name is NOT on the birth cerftificate. This means that under father's name is says "blank" or nothing.