Can I Sue My Mother for Allowing Someone to Sexually Abuse Me

[DaisyArt]

My question involves injury or loss that occurred in the state of: CA

All of my life I have suffered from severe mental illness that has rendered me incapable of functioning normally. I can't keep a job, I don't have friends, my relationships all ended up in disaster and am I alienated from my children.

I have been getting treatment all along but it has been the incorrect treatment. I recently had a new evaluation and it has come to light that my disorder was caused by being sexually abused as a child. By the nature of this disorder, I have blocked out all memories of the occurrence. But between the clarity that has come from my new medication and starting to put the pieces together, it is becoming very clear that I was sexually abused at around the age of 12 (I am 44 now)

My mother allowed her boyfriend (who is a diagnosed schizophrenic) to abuse me. It appears from talking to my sister- who's memory is also foggy- was also abused.

My question is that, since this has just come to light in recent months, can I sue my mother for allowing and not reporting this abuse? Has the statute of limitations run out? If not, what will I need to prove this occurred?

I have adequate medical records to confirm the nature and cause of my illness. There are also records to show the perpetrator was mentally unsound. I also recall us being removed from the home at some point during their relationship.

Do I have a case?

[aaron]

Please clarify what you're describing. Are you stating that you believe you were abused when you were about twelve and, although you have had no memory of the incident, you have recovered some memories as a result of therapy some thirty-two years later? Or are you stating that you've always remembered abuse, but you only now have decided that you want to take action? In the former case, you may be able to bring an action; see California Code of Civil Procedure, Sec. 340.1. In the latter case the statute of limitations has run.

Note that it is not easy to bring a case based upon alleged suppression of memories with no other supporting evidence.

[aardvarc]

Even with California's delayed discovery rules for civil suits arising from childhood sexual abuse, this case appears to be WAY outside any applicable statute of limitations.

See: California Code of Civil Procedure, Chaper 340:

http://law.justia.com/codes/californ...335-349.4.html

You can certainly attempt to claim that the reasonable discovery portion of the statute applies, but if you've been receiving treatment for an extended time for a set of symptomology consistant with CSA, the court isn't likely to certify (allow) the case. You really need to sit down with an attorney who specializes in repressed-memory CSA cases in California (or in whatever state was involved) and let that attorney evaluate the strength of any case based on preponderence of any evidence. If there's any civil case to be brought, it's likely to be against the perpetrator - because repressed memory cases are seldom won, and you're talking about suing a third party. Unless you can prove the case against the perpetrator FIRST, then mom has an absolute defense and any case against her as a third party would be fruitless.

You also need to have some long hard discussions with your therapist about the issue, because given the nature of CSA, most therapists advise VERY strongly against the bringing of such cases in conjunction with "new" discoveries - because you need to understand that bringing such a case is going to put you in the witness chair, in front of the defendant, and you will be grilled and have to discuss exact details of events - and such experiences are often devistating for individuals who have used coping skills of repression for DECADES. From a psychological perspective, you are talking about going from crawling to jumping the Grand Canyon.

You'll also need to figure out if the perp (or mom, if you decide to sue her too) has anything to sue FOR. Even a million dollar judgement is worthless if the subject doesn't HAVE a million dollars, AND you are prepared to take the time and money to pursue COLLECTING any judgement awarded. These are ALL issues you need to discuss with an attorney - but START with your therapist.

[DaisyArt]

I was initially misdiagnosed and continued acting upon that misdiagnosis for years. the wrong diagnosis was probably due to the fact that they did not know a lot about this kind of trauma back then.

I recently moved to a new area and saw a new psychiatrist. Based on my symptoms, he gave me a new diagnosis which is consistent with being a victim of sexual abuse. Since my illness has a dissociative component, being on the proper medication has relieved that and I am starting to put the puzzle together.

I have also spoken to other members about the possibility that I was abused and what they tell me seems to substatiate that the abuse did occur.

I have just recently begun treatment. This seems to be a catch 22. If I do it too soon I risk my own wellbeing but if I wait too long I lose the right to regain something of the life I have not been able to enjoy.

I do know that the perpetrator was confined for mental illness. Believe it or nor, my mother met him in the hospital. She worked there.

I don't recall all of the details but I do remember being removed from the home by the state. I also recall having to testify against my mother in that matter. I assume the state would have a record of that case which would provide complete details.

I am thinking those records could prove she knew or, at least should have known, that she was allowing me to remain in some sort of abusive situation. She may have been abusive herself.

My has nor been with the perp for years and will not speak of him. I don't know if he is even still alive. But dear old mom does have substantial assets.

[aardvarc]

What is contained in old records is irrelevent. Reports can't give testimoney in court. What matters is what you, under oath, can recall on the stand, when questioned by the state and when cross examined by the defense.