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  1. #1
    Join Date
    May 2011
    Posts
    9

    Default Mother Trying to Prevent Father from Seeing His Children

    My question involves a child custody case from the State of: Ca.

    My husbands ex wife is refusing to let his kids come for court ordered visitation. She simply states that the girls don't want to come to our home. The court order states every other weekend, 2 weeks in the summer, holidays split 50/50. My husband has never missed a single visitation.

    The girls have been in counseling for 2 yrs because of the manipulative things their mother tries. She coaches them what to say to the counselor. When in the presence of the counselor and us, when mom leaves, things are great. The therapist says things are fine and notes that the bio mother is manipulating the children.

    The basic cause of all of this is that the ex wife claims she is not getting support. Truth is she IS getting support, recieves $450 a month, but she wants $2700 a month based on what my husband used to make before he got laid off from his previous employer.

    When she says that the girls don't want to come, my husband simply states, " it is my scheduled weekend, I will be there on Friday, usual time to pick up the girls"
    She will then state, "They won't be here"

    My husband has a appointment with their counselor on Wed, at which time he is going to get a written statement/report regarding the manipulation and what she sees happening with the children.

    My question is: After we get the statement/report, what is the next step? What do we file with the court? Is it possible to try for full custody of the children and request supervised visits and that the mother seek counseling herself? If so, how do we begin that process and what do we say?

  2. #2
    Join Date
    Sep 2005
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    Behind a Desk
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    73,775

    Default Re: Mother Trying to Prevent Father from Seeing His Children

    If your husband pays support pursuant to a court order for $450 per month, that's all the order requires. If his ex- believes she can convince a court to assess more support, she can bring a motion to amend the support order. If, on the other hand, your husband is paying a small fraction of his ordered support and is running up a huge arrearage, that's going to haunt him and he needs to bring an appropriate motion to modify support.

    If your ex- wants to enforce the visitation order, mom is refusing and the counselor cannot resolve the problem, dad needs to take mom back to court for make-up parenting time and, if necessary, contempt proceedings.

  3. #3
    Join Date
    May 2011
    Posts
    9

    Default Re: Mother Trying to Prevent Father from Seeing His Children

    So, we file an OSC simply stating "contempt of court ordered visitation and requesting make-parenting time"?

    Thank you for your help

  4. #4
    Join Date
    Sep 2009
    Posts
    424

    Default Re: Mother Trying to Prevent Father from Seeing His Children

    Is Dad showing up anywy? It is important that he show up for the visitations even if she says the girls won't be there.

    Dad (remember you are not a legal party to this) can file to ask the court to hold her in contempt, for make-up parenting, and for a change in the schedule (perhaps to pick up the girls from school on Friday and return them to school on Monday so Mom is not involved with the pick-ups; this would require dad to have clothes, etc. at his house so the girls aren't having to bring a backpack full of clothes and toiletries to school EOW).

    While he can include the letter from the therapist in his filing, he will actually need the therapist to be at the court hearing so as soon as he has the date/time of the hearing, he should schedule it with the therapist.

  5. #5
    Join Date
    May 2011
    Posts
    9

    Default Re: Mother Trying to Prevent Father from Seeing His Children

    AAAhhhh I see. Its good to know that he will have to supeona the therapist and her records.

    He did not go anyway to the pick up, maybe he should have. He was afraid of the scene his ex would cause and what it would put the children thru as she will stop at nothing to be overly dramatic, scream obscenities etc...

    He has an appointment with the therapist tonight to try to figure out his next step. I will print this out so he can read it.

    Will keep you posted on therapist recommends.....

  6. #6

    Default Re: Mother Trying to Prevent Father from Seeing His Children

    Remember child support and visitation are two seperate issues. Absolutely the father needs to pay the court ordered child support (at minimum). The court has entered an order for visitation and neither party can choose which items they want to abide by. If the mother is refusing visitation with the fathers children then he needs to take legal action and not just sit on the sidelines. He can file an order of contempt as the mother is refusing visitation or he can request the court to 'compel' visitation and if the mother still refuses she can face further consequences. A court oder is a court order until the court changes it and both sides needs to make sure they follow it. child support is very important for the childs well being but also is emotional support from both parents which comes from spending quality time with them.

  7. #7
    Join Date
    May 2011
    Posts
    9

    Default Re: Mother Trying to Prevent Father from Seeing His Children

    He does pay support. It is not as much as it is ordered at this time as the money just isn't there since he has been laid off. He has a court date for 8/22 for the support modification and to try to settle any arrears that he has incurred. He hopes to do this by using some of his retirement to pay off the arrears that are incurring while waiting for the court date for the modification.

    This has greatly upset the ex wife. She flat out has said if you do not pay me what I want, no matter what (which is about $2700 a month) then I will do everything I can to keep you from the kids.

    So we needed to know what the steps were to be taken in the court system to stop this.

    My husband did go to the childrens therapist and since the ex wife sent alot of nasty text messages which my husband saved stating basically I wont let you see your kids, the therapist did confirm that this and stuff she has done in the past confirms she is parent alienating. And is willing to write a report for the court stating such.

  8. #8
    Join Date
    Apr 2009
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    26,830

    Default Re: Mother Trying to Prevent Father from Seeing His Children

    The therapist will actually need to testify; reports cannot be cross-examined.
    An intelligent hell would be better than a stupid paradise - Victor Hugo

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