Child Abandonment and Third Party Custody

[Hydie]

My question involves a child custody case from the State of: Va

Here is the situation. My nephew (13) has been living with his father for several years now after his monther died. There have been some issues with his living situation and to make a long story short, when school let out for the summer they asked us if my nephew could come stay with us. Originally it was billed as a trial run to see if something could be worked out for a more permanent solution.

My nephew moved in with us the early part of June. Since that time, his father has not called him once to check on him or see how he was doing. He has also provided so finanicial assistance whatsoever. We received a phone call th end of June from my nephews father saying that he was planning to move later this summer and would we be interested in keeping my nephew permanently. We of course said yes b/c we genuinely love having him with us and he's quite happy and content. Nephews father said that he and the rest of his family were going on a short vacation and when they got back we would iron out the custody arrangement. So, we've been waiting to hear back from them. (Keep in mind that right now, we don't have any legal claim or rights regarding our nephew. He is simply just living in our house).

So, we get a call a little while ago that his father is moving out of state this weekend and he asked if we could write up a custody agreement ourselves to the effect that we agree to joint legal and physcial custody and email it to him so that he can sign and have it notarized. Needless to say, I'm not doing anything until I speak with a lawyer. He has no intention to get any lawyers involved and all of a sudden won't answer any of our phone calls today. So, here it is Friday afternoon. I can't get in touch with a lawyer and my nephews father is leaving town. Good grief.

So, now what happens? I hope to hear from my lawyer on Monday morning and I'm sure he'll answer my questions then, but I'm just very anxious and on edge right now. If the father has left town and left the child with us, can my husband and I get a temporary custody order in place until it all gets resolved? If this considered abandonment? I'm just not understanding the father's thought process with all of this.

[eerelations]

Father's thought process is that if you do it all nice and legal, he'll wind up being court-ordered to pay you child support. If you do it his way, he's not legally bound to pay you anything.

[tex11]

Six weeks is far far to premature to even think that you have standing or right to file suit for custody. Six months and you 'might' have some leverage, depending upon the specifics and laws in your state. Let your attorney negotiate with dad as delicately and amicably as possible, because if he feels his rights are threatened, he can promptly take his son back, and end of story.

[Hydie]

First off, perhaps I should clarify something. I'm not looking for a court battle or to burn bridges on our end and I don't think that I implied that in my original message. As I said, both parties have verbally agreed to custody. My concern is that the father is very quickly moving out of town and is not returning phone calls all of a sudden or wanting to get lawyers involved. It just doesn't "seem right" to me. My first concern is for the child. If he leaves this child with us, we have no legal right to do anything for him. What if he gets hurt? He starts school back next month. I can't enroll him unless I have some sort of custody of him. I was wondering if we could get temp custody from the court while the rest is being worked out. I admit, I'm clueless to the legal world and don't know my way around. So, perhaps that's the way to go. I asked about abandonment b/c someone told me that's what this was. I don't know. I'll just wait and talk to my lawyer next week I guess. Was just looking for some input/advice on here to tide me over until then.