How to Legally Get My Children if Their Father is Hospitalized for Substance Abuse

[time4change]

My question involves a child custody case from the State of: Louisiana
My ex-husband and I share joint custody and we have not followed the custody guidelines because of the childrens schedules. I was unaware that my ex had relapsed into substance abuse and when I found out 6 months ago I have been keeping my children when the "grandparents" thought that they were with their dad. And when they had to be at their Dads house I was there to make sure that they were okay. Now my exhusband is in the hospital basically on life support due to his substance abuse. The grandparents have taken my children and will not give them to me. They are trying to say that my ex does not have a substance abuse problems and they think by keeping the children from me then I won't find out and won't take them from him. I want him to get well but not at the expense of my childrens safety. I have a very good job and beautiful stable, safe home. My children are very upset and confused and they want to come home.My question is though I do have legal joint custody, yet we have changed the arrangement yet never had the court rule. Will the grandparent be able to keep my children from me if there is no where in the papers that they have any say so? Will I be penalized for not following the arrangement made 8 years ago? What can I legally do? (when I refer to Grandparents I am speaking of his parents)

[jk]

have you thought of calling the police and asking them to assist you in getting your children back?

[time4change]

Yes! I was going to do that last week when he was admitted. I went and got the children but his Mother was so upset about her son that when she called to find out when she could pick them up I didn't have the heart to say no. She is great! But She left for vacation and the other set of grandparents have them and threatened to cut my ex-husband off if I tried to get the children. At the time I knew he needed them to take care of him (the first few days in the hopspital) but now that I have heard that they are planning on continuing to be in denial and let him go home when and if he gets out and that they have no intentions of sending him to rehab. They expect that I am going to sit back and allow my chilren to be alone with him???? I am honestly afraid of my ex-inlaws. They are not very nice, and they make things happen that didn't happen. If you know what I mean. I have nothing to hide and I just want my children back. I do not want them to cut my ex-husband off, nor do I want my children to hate me because they do not see this side of their grandparents. The grandparents give the children luxuries that I can not provide, and do not think are necessary, but my children are going to be very upset because they do not want anyone arguing.

[Dogmatique]

Is he terminal?

What is his actual physical condition?

He's either on life-support or he's not. So what's his REAL situation and what's the prognosis?

[time4change]

They are not telling me exactly what the prognosis is. He has severe pancreatitis, not functioning, infected and has a cyst, only 15% of liver is functioning, has a PIC line, on IV Morphine, Has blisters all over his back, on oxygen, etc......... He has no controll of his bowels, he is in ICU. They said that he will not be getting out any time soon. But the family did not realize he was drinking (atleast a 5th a night) and taking medications that are contraindicated with alcohol. They are not even going to visit him. And will not allow our children to call me. I get inside info from a family member that is very concerned about our children.

[Dogmatique]

When was the last time you saw them?

How frequently have you been in contact with them?

In other words - how disruptive is it going to be to rip them from their grandparents?

[time4change]

I had them last weekend. I had been talking to them every day numerous times a day until the grandmother left, then the calls were whispers, then they were not able to call and I would receive very short text messages asking to come home. My son did call me yesterday morning and asked me to bring him snacks to his school which I did, and tonight I got an instant message saying MOM, and I replied instantly and he did not come back on. My daughter sent me a text saying I LOVE YOU MOM tonight, but she could not talk

How disruptive? Well that would depend on what the grandparent do in retalliation? If they would just let them come home and stay in contact with them that would be fine. But if they start making threats or say that we have to go back to court with him in this condition that would be pretty disturbing. in a perfect world they would open the lines and I would be happy to let them stay with grans on weekends or when their dad was supposed to have custody

[Dogmatique]

OK.

You have joint custody with your husband, right?

And the grandparents have NO custody WHATSOEVER?

Get your court papers, and go and get your kids! They have NO say. They don't even have standing to sue you for visitation at this point. Get your kids, give them some stability. Then if and when Dad gets better, you can reassess the situation.

[time4change]

Thank You! I did go to court house and get the custody papers. Yes I have joint custody every other week 7 days on 7 days off. Grandparents not mentioned in judgment anywhere! Had 2 clerks review to make sure I didn't miss anything. Judgement was from 8 years ago and we have not followed it. The last 6 months the children go to the grandparents after school but I have been either going to their dads and making dinner and getting them in bed, or bringing them to my house. BUT the grandparents did not know!

[Dogmatique]

Then heck - go and get your kids. They need you right now more than ever.