My question involves a child custody case from the State of: TN
So my wife and I (now seperated/ not divorced yet) got pregnant with our first child last novemeber. She is due august 13, 2011. I know its a little early to start all of this custody discussion but I am scheduled to leave for Basic Military Training in April and am concerned with being able to get information after that point.
Before we got married, my wife had had some drug issues. She had made alot of progress in breaking her bad habits once we got married. And when we found out she was pregnant she did quit using. At this point, our marriage was going fantastic. We had an apartment in Huntsville, AL, We had just gotten back from a trip to see her family in AR, and we were very excited about the pregnancy. However, in late december, 2010, we found out that we were going to have to move out of our apartment. She suggested we move to Taft, TN (halfhour from huntsville/ where she lived when we met). I knew that she had friends out there and figured it would make sense bc she was not working and it would enable her to be with her friends while i was at work. On Jan 1, 2011 we moved to Taft. This is the point where the marriage took a fatal turn.
Very suddenly (2-3 days) she has pushed me away and starts acting distant. Come to find out, her friends (whom i didnt know well) were using drugs and had convinced her that using pot and rx pills would not harm the baby. So she succumbed to the peer pressure and started using these drugs. After I found out I voiced my concerns and told her that she needed to stop. She accused me of acting like her parent and trying to change her. When i found her in bed with a local drug dealer, I left.
So now we've seperated and I am concerned about the safety of the baby. After much drama and pressure she decided to go back to AR. So, thinkin that shed be in AR with her parents, I decided to move back to FL and spend time with my parents before leaving for BMT. However, once i was in FL, she changed her mind and stayed in Taft. She is living with her friends (the ones who got her back on drugs) and she has expressed to me her intent on staying with or near them even after the baby is born. If the baby does make it to term, I dont want my child raised in that environment. She says she wants primary custody and will not budge on her stance. Even if she does clean up her act and stop using drugs, she will still be hanging out with people who do them. But I know it is extremely difficult for a father to get primary custody.
So, how do i go about getting custody? Being a woman, she automatically has the upperhand. Do I have to prove that she is unfit? How does the court define 'unfit'?