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  1. #1

    Default What Rights to Custody Does a Sex Offender Parent Have

    My question involves a child custody case from the State of: Wisconsin. The issue here is of my ex suddenly wanting to be a "father" after not seeing my daughter pretty much since she was born. She turned 5 recently and he has not seen her since she was about 15 months old. She does not know him and has known my husband as her dad. (considering he has been the only one to care for her like one) I recieved an email from the "father" who says he wants to be a father. So I started filing custody papers because for some odd reason this was never done when we first visited child support after he was released from prison. (He went on a conviction of sexual assault, it was to an adult woman, he went to prison about a month after I found out I was pregnant) So after we visited child support we thought we would begin getting paper work for figuring out custody, but it never happened and neither of us ever pursued it, till now. I always thought he would just stay gone and I would never have to worry about it, so I just left it alone.
    Anyhow. Now we have mediation set up for just a couple weeks from now. (Which I'm sure he wont attend anyhow) I was trying to figure out if I really actually have to work with him. He is a registered sex offender, who is not allowed contact with minors. He also has it stated in his parole rules that he is not allowed contact with my daughter from an incident that happend 3 years ago. (He threatened to kill me and take her. I freaked out and called his parole officer and since she had had many troubles with him in the past with things like his anger and threatening manner she said she was making it a rule in his parole not to have contact with her as long as he is on parole) So along with being a sex offender, having rules in his parole against seeing her, and actually not having any contact with her for the last 4 years and me for the last 3, never paying a dime in child support, and never having a job, do I have to cooperate with anything in mediation? Can I just go in and say I dont want to give him anything since all this is stacked against him? He really is not a good person and it's not fair to my child that he wants to attempt being a human now and come into her life. Anyone have any advice?

  2. #2
    Join Date
    Sep 2009
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    Default Re: What Rights to Custody Does a Sex Offender Parent Have

    No. You are not required to agree to anything in mediation. That gem of advice is dispensed reguarly on this forum, and I have often wondered about it's validity. I mean, why have mediation at all, if that is the prevailing attitude? But it is for cases such as yours that that advice is so applicable. I'm not an attorney, but if I had your circumstances you can bet I would not agree to anything in mediation. If his sex offender conviction actually prohibits contact with minors, and he is still on parole and prohibited from seeing your daughter, I can't fathom a reason to negotiate with him at all.

  3. #3

    Default Re: What Rights to Custody Does a Sex Offender Parent Have

    Quote Quoting NdK1009
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    No. You are not required to agree to anything in mediation. That gem of advice is dispensed reguarly on this forum, and I have often wondered about it's validity. I mean, why have mediation at all, if that is the prevailing attitude? But it is for cases such as yours that that advice is so applicable. I'm not an attorney, but if I had your circumstances you can bet I would not agree to anything in mediation. If his sex offender conviction actually prohibits contact with minors, and he is still on parole and prohibited from seeing your daughter, I can't fathom a reason to negotiate with him at all.
    If you are not going to agree to mediation, dont waste your time and money. If he wants child custody,or visitation, make him start the process.

  4. #4

    Default Re: What Rights to Custody Does a Sex Offender Parent Have

    Thats the problem. I was the one who started it. See when we first went for child support the only thing that they did for us was tell us how much he would have to pay each week WHEN he found a job. (which, by the way, he never has) They never referred us to the family court or told us that we even had to go over there and start it ourselves. So custody has never been established. So I decided that if the paper work is going to get filed then I am going to have to do it myself. (I just learned that if custody is not established then I could never do anything if he were to take her because no one has full custody or placement.) So I filed it and they said we had to go to mediation. We didnt have to pay a fee for the first time around but if he bails on it then he will have to be the one to pay a fee and open it back up. This is so frustrating because I cant get straight answers from people who may know a little and I dont have a fortune to spend on asking a lawyer a few questions. I have some but not enough to get a lawyer. I do appriciate any advice on here, dont get me wrong. Anyhow. I want to go to the mediation myself because I have a feeling he wont make it anyways. So if we cant figure anything out in mediation then we go in front of a judge right?

  5. #5
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    Default Re: What Rights to Custody Does a Sex Offender Parent Have

    Quote Quoting PCMom
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    If you are not going to agree to mediation, dont waste your time and money. If he wants child custody,or visitation, make him start the process.


    In some jurisdictions mediation is a REQUIREMENT. Both parties must turn up or risk being held in contempt.

    (That's of course not saying that an agreement must be reached - that's a different matter entirely).

    OP, yes - if an agreement cannot be reached, it will go to trial.
    An intelligent hell would be better than a stupid paradise - Victor Hugo

    Do not microwave grapes

  6. #6
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    Default Re: What Rights to Custody Does a Sex Offender Parent Have

    If the terms of his parole include no contact with your daughter and your husband is interested in adopting, you may wish to pursue a TPR and step-parent adoption. Of course, that means no child support but if he is dangerous to your daughter, it protects her.

  7. #7
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    Default Re: What Rights to Custody Does a Sex Offender Parent Have

    That raises an interesting question - his original conviction.

    A sexual offense against an adult generally does not mean the offender is barred from being around minors, especially his/her own children.

    OP needs to discover exactly what the terms of probation are.
    An intelligent hell would be better than a stupid paradise - Victor Hugo

    Do not microwave grapes

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