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  1. #1

    Default Child Custody As Blackmail

    My question involves a child custody case from the State of: Utah
    My husband took our 2 year oldson for his 1 week visitation. I asked for it an itinerary, and he refused. He said he didnt have to give me an explaination of where he was going for a week. I backed down and let him take our son. He agreed to drop off son at daycare on a thursday at 5:30pm so I could pick son up.

    During the week, I texted message husband to see if son was doing ok. Son had never been away from me that long before, and I was concered 1 week was too long. I had no verbal, written, or visual contact with son. Father and son disapeared.

    I went to the daycare at 5:30PM as agreed upon, and the daycare said they had not seen or heard from Father or son for over 1 week.

    I panicked. I called my attorney. He said to wait 4 more days until Monday and call the cops if son was not returned.

    I called husbands work to see if he was there, and did not get an answer. I called his boss, and did not get an answer. I left a voice mail to have boss call me and let me know if he had seen father or where he might be.

    After 11 days, father returned son to daycare. Daycare called me to let me know he dropped off our son.

    The next day, I was served with a stalking order. Husband said I stalked him by sending him text messages when he was on his 1 week vacation.

    At the child custody hearing, husband said he would drop stalking order if I signed away parental rights. I said no, so we are goingto court for the stalking order.

    My questions
    1. Can he use this stalking order as blackmail against me?
    2. I filed an OSC against him for taking son for 11 days
    3. Till this day, I have do not know what happened to my son for 11 days, or where he was.
    4. I have primary custody of our son.
    5. Is it legal to use the court system as a weapon against me and to use our son to try to change parental custody.

    Help

  2. #2
    Join Date
    Apr 2009
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    Somewhere near Canada
    Posts
    27,353

    Default Re: Child Custody As Blackmail

    1. Only if you let him.
    2. That's probably going to result in nothing but a slap on the wrist, if anything.
    3. On Dad's parenting time he's under no obligation to tell you where he is or what he's doing with kiddo.
    4. OK.
    5. I'm confused - what does Dad actually want to accomplish? You cannot sign away parental right like that. Is he wanting you to sign off CUSTODIAL rights?
    An intelligent hell would be better than a stupid paradise - Victor Hugo

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  3. #3

    Default Re: Child Custody As Blackmail

    Quote Quoting Dogmatique
    View Post
    1. Only if you let him.
    2. That's probably going to result in nothing but a slap on the wrist, if anything.
    3. On Dad's parenting time he's under no obligation to tell you where he is or what he's doing with kiddo.
    4. OK.
    5. I'm confused - what does Dad actually want to accomplish? You cannot sign away parental right like that. Is he wanting you to sign off CUSTODIAL rights?

    He wants full custody, with me to have no rights. He filed child abuse charges with DCFS, which came back that I was not abusing my child. During the DCFS investigation, in the report, he asked DCFS to take our child away from me and give him full custody. DCFS said they would not do that and did not believe the child was in danger.

  4. #4

    Default Re: Child Custody As Blackmail

    Quote Quoting Dogmatique
    View Post
    1. Only if you let him.
    2. That's probably going to result in nothing but a slap on the wrist, if anything.
    3. On Dad's parenting time he's under no obligation to tell you where he is or what he's doing with kiddo.
    4. OK.
    5. I'm confused - what does Dad actually want to accomplish? You cannot sign away parental right like that. Is he wanting you to sign off CUSTODIAL rights?
    He wants me to sign away custodial rights, have on rights of visitation, and he does not want to pay child support.

  5. #5
    Join Date
    Sep 2005
    Location
    Behind a Desk
    Posts
    75,015

    Default Re: Child Custody As Blackmail

    This eleven day stretch - did it overlap with the abuse allegations and investigation? If so, did you know about the abuse allegations and investigation during that time? Did you talk to any social workers during that time? If so, did you raise your questions about access to your son with the social workers conducting the investigation?

  6. #6
    Join Date
    Jan 2008
    Location
    Toledo, OH
    Posts
    16,087

    Default Re: Child Custody As Blackmail

    He wants me to sign away custodial rights, have on rights of visitation, and he does not want to pay child support.
    He can WANT the sun, moon, and stars on a chain. That doesn't mean he stands the proverbial snowball's chance of GETTING it.

    Try not to fret. Your ex is trying to power-trip, and it's not going to end well for him. You will likely get a tongue lashing from the judge for pestering him on vacation - as Doggie has already noted, he does NOT have to give you an itinerary or any other information as to the child during his parenting time - but that's about it. Being overprotective and panicky is not enough to have your rights involuntarily terminated, and there simply isn't any way for them to be voluntarily signed away, either.

    Daddy needs to get used to the idea of child support.
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