Absent Biological Father, Stepfather Wants to Adopt

[BLOHR]

My question involves adoption law for the State of: FL

I told my daughters father about her when she was two, which is four years ago. Since then he has done nothing to help me raise her. He and his current girlfriend use drugs, so her stepfather and I rarely let her go over to see him, and he usually doesn't try to call her. I filed for child support but he moves around so much they can't keep track of him. We have asked that he go and pick the papers up from Child support and he won't. I have asked for money and he always has excuses. Since he is not on the birth certificate, we have asked him to just get a letter notarized stating he wants nothing to do with the child and will not contact her or us in the future and he will not try for any type of custody in the future, he won't. Her stepfather and I have raised my daughter, his daughter and now we have a daughter together and My husband wants to adopt her. We have spoken with her and our families about this and everyone is on board, he has been her father almost her whole life and now we would like to make it official. What do we have to do? Is it considered child abandonment since he has made no effort to do anything? Do we need a lawyer?

[Dogmatique]

Yes, you need an attorney.

Dad's rights will need to be terminated and that's not a DIY project.

Also, a notarized letter means nothing at all and would not be legally binding.

[BLOHR]

Thank you, what is a DIY project? He shouldn't have any rights if he is not on the birth certificate though. Could I do it through Legal Zoom? How long do you think the whole process would take? Why do I need an attorney? Can't we just fill out paperwork and be done with it?

[Dogmatique]

DIY = Do It Yourself.

Couple of questions for you.

Has he LEGALLY been established as Dad?

(Ie, is there actually a court or administrative order for child support? Did he sign an AOP?)

Does he WANT contact with his child? You said you don't "allow" him contact - would he want contact if he thought he could have regular contact?

Have you tried talking to him about adoption?

[BLOHR]

Thank you for your response.
He hasw not been legally established the father, CS was suppose to serve him with some typr of papers and they were never able to do that and he never went to pick up the papers.

He and his family do want contact with the child but, they just don't want to pay, and most of the time he tells the child he is coming to see her he either never shows up without a call or he cancels and this happens more then 50 percent of the time.

We have tried talking to him about adoption and letting him know that my husband wants to be her father, but all three or four times he has said let me talk to some people and I will get back to you. Never does and usually goes into hiding for a couple of months.

[Dogmatique]

Then I think you have an uphill battle on your hands.

If he wants to be Dad, the court is going to be very reluctant to terminate is rights against his wishes.

This is another reason you need an attorney.

[BLOHR]

If I have proof, pictures and such would that help in any way getting his rights involuntarily terminated or the fact he has not tried with the child support, would that be sufficent evidence of child abandonment? Every little change I have ever known about him was reported to child support to help them. But he has not as so much lifted a finger for this little girl, even when he use to take her and I would pick her up he wouldn't be there and she was with his girl friends sister doing art. That was the last time. I can't let him continue to let her down. I have tried so hard to keep my children safe and away from scumbags just to find our her father is the one I needed to protect her from. I can't let another tear run down her face from him.

[Dogmatique]

Proof and pictures of what?

In the past year how often has he seen kiddo?

[aardvarc]

You said that the father's name isn't on the birth certificate. And, that he's never been served with anything to go to court. If dad didn't acknowledge paternity, or have a court determine him as the legal father, then that means that dad is a legal nobody. He doesn't HAVE any rights to terminate at this point. He has no child TO abandon as far as the courts are concerned. He'd have to actually GO to court and establish himself as the father if he wants to have any rights to fight over. No, you can't stop him from going to court and attempting to do so. But until he DOES, you're under no obligation to speak to him or allow him access to the child. If he harasses you, you contact the police and see about seeking a restraining order.

[BLOHR]

So if we went ahead with her stepfather adopting her should have no problems, right?

In the past year maybe a handful. Proof and Pictures that he uses and his girlfriend he is living with uses.