Options With a Mentally Ill Adult Child

[BRANBRAN]

My question involves emancipation laws for the State of: New York I am at my wits end! I have a mentally ill 19 (turning 20 in Feb 2011) year old daughter. She is physically abusive to me and some members of my family. We have done everything we possibly can for her over the years. It has been absolute HELL! She has had every service available, several hospitalizations, we have been through the courts, both Family and Criminal, I have even tried to have her declared incompetent so that I could remain in control of her psychiatric needs as she is now technically and adult, to no avail. We have exhausted all resources. She refuses any kind of treatment, wont' take any meds at all. Therefore she is completely unstable and out of control, she is a terror to live with, she goes into uncontrollable rages and is violent towards me. I have a 9 year old son who has been through hell, and now deserves to live in peace. It's his turn to have my focus. And although I love my daughter dearly, I just cannot live with her! I don't know what to do at this point. I am legally and financially responsible for this kid, yet she just cannot live in my household! If I throw her out and advise her to go to the local DSS office so that they could provide housing for her, I will get sued for child support which I cannot afford! WHAT DO I DO??? Any suggestions, I am absolutely DESPERATE!!!

[Mr. Knowitall]

1.

(a) Except as provided in subdivision two of this section, the parents of a child under the age of twenty-one years are chargeable with the support of such child and, if possessed of sufficient means or able to earn such means, shall be required to pay for child support a fair and reasonable sum as the court may determine. The court shall make its award for child support pursuant to the provisions of this subdivision. The court may vary from the amount of the basic child support obligation determined pursuant to paragraph (c) of this subdivision only in accordance with paragraph (f) of this subdivision.

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You can put up with her until she turns 21, try to get DSS to take charge of her while trying to minimize the amount of support you're charged based upon your limited means, try to find a publicly funded or charitable alternative for her care, see what you can do through any private medical insurance you have.... No easy answers.

[BRANBRAN]

It's a catch 22, they take my rights away as a parent, cannot enforce anything upon her that she needs to function somewhat normally, yet I am legally responsible for her?!?!? It just makes no sense to me at all! How can "they" take a parent's authority away, yet hold us responsible for our children? I just don't understand the logic in that! Especially when dealing with a mentally ill person. She may be technically an adult, but she is not nearly mature enough nor stable enough to make decisions for herself! It is so beyond frustrating! Well, I really appreciate your time, thank you!