My question involves criminal law for the state of: California
I don't really know how to start this, but I'll do my best.
Basically, My Fiance and I were involved in a bit of a scuffle yesterday. I had found out some things about her from a friend that had really affected the way I felt about her and following later that night she was drunk and under the influence of marijuana (so, more uninhibited, I guess) and she had said some things along the lines of she thought the relationship was over. She didn't really have much to say about it beyond that, but it bugged me the whole night. I asked her about it the next morning and she basically brushed off my question telling me I was stupid and she was just going to stay with her grandma. I walked away for a second, but after having dealt with this mostly for a few months (being left in the dark about the status of our relationship, knowing she had lied about some major stuff in the past and known she was talking/flirting with other guys on the side) I just felt I couldn't let it go. I went up to her and told her that I had to know, it was important, I had to know how she felt about the relationship. She again restated I was stupid and that I just had to go away. Being already emotional and needing some sort of closure, I pinned her against the wall, my forearm against her chest (I understand that this constitutes Domestic Battery?...Also, yes, in retrospect, I do understand that this was the moment I should of just walked away and moved on, before it got to this). I told her, I just needed an answer and that I wanted to know how it was so easy to throw me away. Without knowing what was going inside her head, I can only assume she felt cornered and threatened and broke down in tears. I immediately let go, realizing what I had done and just backed off. I grabbed the phone and told her she needed to call her grandma and get picked up, I was afraid of it going any further. She refused to take the phone and ran out into the bedroom, but her grandmother called at that instant (she was watching her son at that time) and she answered calling about how I had hit her and needed to be picked up and then hung up. I walked out and there were further verbal barbs that escalated in me saying "it's your fault it got here" (I was referring to the relationship and her lying, deceit and refusal to open up and the relationship hitting this point; however I can see how she misconstrued that to mean the physicality) and she yelled back "how dare you?" and ran at me with her shoe, hitting me in the back and the back of my head, then dropped the shoe and proceeded to hit me in the face 5-6 times, closed fist. I then restrained her and while I held her (hoping she would calm down) she started threatening my life, telling me her uncles would kill me and that I was a nothing, etc. I then felt she had calmed down and let her go, but she immediately went back to hitting me (closed fist again) 4 or 5 times in the face and chest. This is where I had made the mistake. Having been beat on by her twice in previous altercations (I never reciprocated, but never reported either), I just felt emotionally drained and angry so I hit her back, once in the face, maybe two or three times in the chest. After this, she threatened to break my stuff (my computer monitors and a few other things), so I restrained her once more and told her I wasn't going to fight anymore and to leave and wait on the patio or something. She went to the roommates room who interjected until I left. She had told him she didn't plan on calling the police and I had no plans to, so I left. However, her mother called the police as soon as she heard, so they arrived after I left (though, I made it clear to the roommate once he let me know they were there, that I would return if the police needed me and he made sure that they included that in their notes). They took her statement, the roommates statement and then left while she and her family moved her stuff out. They called me 20 minutes later at work to take my version of the altercation (though, I fear I was a bit too vague).
<where i am at>
* there were no witnesses, the entire altercation occurred in the room between me and her. the roommate was brought in at the end of the altercation.
* according to the police on the phone, if I do get convicted, it's a felony. To my understanding, these cases can be felony or misdemeanor, so I'm inclined to believe they're already siding with her.
* we both left with bruises, I had scratches and bruises on my face, which I took pictures of and she had a black eye
* I don't have much money and fear I won't be able to get a lawyer and will be stuck with a public defender
* based on the limited information i can find...the vast majority of these cases (first time or not) end in jail time, correct me if I'm wrong please?
* i am receiving threats indirectly (facebook, the cellphone she used to use [i paid for it and it was on my phone plan, so she left it behind, though she took the memory card, since it had her pictures and video on it], statements made to my roommate when they arrived, etc)
* according to a mutual friend (who I immediately told not to carry any messages back between me and her due to the emergency restraining order), she doesn't seem like she wants to testify or push it, but her family are pushing her to do so which i already assumed based on experience with them, so it's likely they will try their hardest to get me convicted.
</where i am at>
* first, when the meeting/case/etc is handled by the DA, will there be a chance to go over the sequence of events again just to make sure everything is clear or with they go solely off of the police reports?
* what's the likelyhood of prison/jail in this case, based on these facts and the fact that there's no previous history or any previous criminal offenses (i understand i did wrong and am remorseful and will take a punishment, but i want to avoid jail at all costs since my understanding is felony = 1yr+ and the last thing I want is my life ruined at 22 )?
* is it likely that i will bear the brunt of this and that it will be me defending myself (plaintiff/defendant) only or is this more of a two-sided issue where the judge rules judgement on both sides?
* i want to get enrolled in anger management, since i do feel this was an issue that went out of hand. should i do that, or will that be detrimental during the case?
* what advice can you guys offer to help me with the situation?
If I have any further information/questions, I'll get back to you and thanks in advance.