How to Change from Joint Custody to Full Custody

[starfish2009]

My question involves a child custody case from the State of: Texas

My husband and I recently divorced agreeing upon Joint Custody. I am already seeing as to how this was a mistake. Our current visitation schedule revolves around him and his sporting schedules. Soccer, football, hockey.

He is a good dad, and get's her on his scheduled days, pays 1/2 of daycare etc.

In the event that I am 'picking up' more days because of his sporting events, I am going to seriously consider filing for full custody. As it stands, I am picking up days that he has games and if I can't do it, then he asks my parents. (His parents live out of state). I can see this quickly becoming the norm for him.

In the event that I should need to file for full custody, how hard is it to have joint custody changed? Do I have to prove him to be a bad father? I know in the state of texas it's very easy for the mother to get full custody, but did I screw myself out of not doing that from the get go?

I'd appreciate any help and input.

[Dogmatique]

You probably have two problems here.

The first is that you're recently divorced; that generally precludes you from filing to modify the current arrangement so soon unless there has been a drastic change (such as the other parent being jailed, dying, serious illness etc).

The second is that even if you were able to file time-wise, you'd still have to show a substantial change in the child's circumstances in order to modify.

As far as proving him to be a bad father, you may as well forget that - you agreed to joint custody, which tells the court that you think he's a fine parent.

[mamabear2102003]

My question involves a child custody case from the State of: Texas

My husband and I recently divorced agreeing upon Joint Custody. I am already seeing as to how this was a mistake. Our current visitation schedule revolves around him and his sporting schedules. Soccer, football, hockey.

He is a good dad, and get's her on his scheduled days, pays 1/2 of daycare etc.

In the event that I am 'picking up' more days because of his sporting events, I am going to seriously consider filing for full custody. As it stands, I am picking up days that he has games and if I can't do it, then he asks my parents. (His parents live out of state). I can see this quickly becoming the norm for him.

In the event that I should need to file for full custody, how hard is it to have joint custody changed? Do I have to prove him to be a bad father? I know in the state of texas it's very easy for the mother to get full custody, but did I screw myself out of not doing that from the get go?

I'd appreciate any help and input.

Be thankful, there are many that can't say the same.

[Dogmatique]

Be thankful, there are many that can't say the same.

No kidding!!!!

[starfish2009]

Be thankful, there are many that can't say the same.

I am 100% thankful. There are some horrible circumstances out there and I am surely not crying over mine. I just want to know what to prepare for in the future, if the need should arise.

[Dogmatique]

Well, as I said earlier, you'll need to show a change in circumstance.

[starfish2009]

Well, as I said earlier, you'll need to show a change in circumstance.

What does that mean?

My concern is that the way our visitation is working out now, every other week she is in a different bed every night. This cannot continue in her school years. If he doesn't agree with any other options because of sports, what will I do?

[mamabear2102003]

Bottom line? Doesn't matter if she's in a different bed everynight on dad's time, as long as she's in school and doing well. Although not ideal, if this is how dad lives, she learns to adapt. You will need to show a change of circumstance that is harmful to the child.

Honestly, you knew this prior to the current situation, and now it's an issue. That's not fair to the father, when you want him to change because you did. He was good enough to have a child with, he's not doing drugs or other illegal activities, so now you have to show where something has CHANGED that wasn't there when you started.

[Dogmatique]

The thing is, you agreed to this schedule.

To change it now, you'll need to show that something has changed.

When you first agreed, what exactly was the arrangement? How long did it last? What exactly is going on now?

(Word for word, minus names, might help )

[aardvarc]

Having grown up in a similar situation (different place every 3 or 4 days, between dad, grandparents, aunts, uncles, etc.), I can honestly say that it's only traumatic when you leave something behind that you really want and don't want to wait for the couple of days of rotation before going back to that particular place. Beyond that, children are very adaptable, even in their school years, so unless there are other factors involved, simply being different places all the time, in and of itself, won't be seen as a "harm" - particularly if the different caretakers are family members. Now if he's leaving the child with neighbors, strangers, people with convictions of crimes against children, that's a different matter, but short of that, won't even make the judge blink.