Oregon:
(about 6-7 months of time in this story)
Wife was seeing a PMHNP every so often for meds (cymbalta, adderall, valium) along with all kinds of other "sample" drugs here and there... Along with all of these drugs, my wife would take up to 6 OTC pain meds at a time 2 to 3 times a day along with diet pills, water pills etc. etc... A real cocktail of stuff going on here...
After a visit to the PMHNP, wife begins to start having real problems getting through the day without thinking someone is 'bugging' her cell phone, recording her conversations, GPS tracking her, remotely controlling here computer (that has no lan connection) etc. etc...
I'm thinking it will pass, but it doesn't... It gets worse... And worse with each passing month... Up and down, up and down, her emotions... I can never tell which person I'm talking to... My wife, or inspector gadget... When one day she starts to focus on "me" as the one doing "it"... Now I'm the accused... A husband, the only bread winner and now a "spy"...
I'm at a loss, trying to conduct home business and pay employees along with all the other day to day duties of running a business "with no help"...
I cannot talk to wife about it, she won't discuss it because she thinks I'm the one doing it, and she won't allow me to visit PMHNP with her to discuss... I have no answers and nobody will talk to me about it because of privacy laws in oregon even though we're married...
PMHNP is "treating" my wife under the table - pro-bono(sp)... and in about the 6th month of this (elevated weirdness) there's an argument when my wife says to me that 1. "even -PMHNP- says I should get away from you as fast as I can"... She goes on to say that 2. "My father even says you (I) could be dangerous"...
This is all absolutely absurd... Completely preposterous...
I can only think that these things were said because of what fabricated stories my wife may have told them...
I confronted father regarding the "could be dangerous" statement and he didn't confirm or deny it... He says he really doesn't know me... I say, look at what I do, and that will tell you who I am... I marry daughter, I buy house, car and I pay for her lawyers to reverse custody of her son (to her)... A Loving husband that would navigate shark infested waters -- you know the rest... (AND I'm dangerous?) -- these people are now on my $h#^ list for making such reckless statements to a (now) unstable person, potentially adding fuel to the fire (read on)
About another 3-4 weeks goes by... Wife is really freaking out on me... There's not an hour that goes by without me being accused of taking something, hiding something, recording something etc... And all I can do is try and listen to her... Help if needed... Explain "real world" tech. stuff to her and how "things" work... Buy her favorite coffee in the morning and at the same time, listen to the little person on my shoulder telling me to "watch my back" and just keep my focus, 8am to 5pm, on my work that is in serious decline now...
She confronts me at my work desk... She thinks I'm in the process of "recording something of her"... She wants to see... I roll back, let her in... She finds nothing... I say "take your time, there's nothing here, I'm not doing whatever it is you think I'm doing..." 10 minutes goes by... She's repeating her steps over and over looking for "things"... She's done, I ask to resume working, I roll up closer to my desk and she's not finished... She thinks that since I want her to stop -- she must be getting close to finding something -- she goes twice as hard... grabbing papers directly in front of me on the desk... she reaches over me grabbing stuff, shuffling things around and I slam both hands (palm down) on the desk... Enough... There's nothing... Stop it!!
Upon feeling my forearm against her stomach area in effect, guarding my 3 foot wide space in front of me she (as if in shock that I slammed my hands on the desk) jumps back away from me... and I hear a thud... I look behind me and she's on the floor... A shiver tingles my back and neck and I ask "what are you doing".. Why did you fall on the ground?... I'm stunned...
The next morning, she confronts me with bruises on her arm and claims I did it...
I can no longer work... My antenna is now extended... Something MORE is happening here and I'm finding it extremely difficult to get through the day without dwelling on "what in the hell is going on here"...
a few days later... She falls on the floor again and this time she calls 911... I told the truth to police... I told them of the meds and that she'd been staying up all day and night for days on end over the past week... I told them she would leave at 9am in the morning and not return until 2am at night the previous days... I told them of the absolute loss of contact with reality... They asked me if it was meth?... I said, it seems like it... But I don't know exactly... 30 minutes goes by and I'm arrested. I'm arrested for telling the truth and because there's a mandatory arrest policy in Oregon... I (the husband, the step father, the bread winner the person not on any meds or 'issues') goes to the hole...
I'm denied counsel because I make to much money... But business has already crashed and I have no money left... I hire the only person I could afford, I pay his retainer, he cashes my check inside 5 minutes at my bank after our initial meeting then about a week later in a meeting where I'm telling him my story... I get to listen to him tell me "I don't believe it, it doesn't make sense"... My world just imploded... He didn't follow up on one witness to my wife’s unusual behavior and didn't check up on one element in my story... The only thing I could do is delay, set over, set over before a plea hearing in hopes "SOMEBODY" would say "wait a minute"... What's really going on here...
That didn't happen and 3 months removed from the "incident"... I was told to take a no contest plea with 2 years probation or the DDA was going to pile on measure 11 (mandatory jail) charges because my step son was in the house and heard an argument but didn't see anything... That argument was me letting my wife know that if she didn't stop the hallucinations, I'm putting her stuff on the front lawn... I can't take it anymore...
I signed the no contest plea with 18mo probation and DVIC treatment I don't need, in hopes everything would smooth over and I could avoid putting my own family (wife and stepson) thru a trial where my only defense would have been her mental health condition... Equally as important, I didn't trust the legal system and political climate surrounding DV laws... I feel it's a body of law that purposefully and maliciously targets Men as lobbied and created by NOW... I couldn't stomach the thought of actually being convicted at trial by a jury sympathetic to the happy face my wife would have put on thinking she "caught" the "spy" in her house... I did not want divorce, I knew she didn't 'really' either... I also knew she would have a sobering moment one day having the revelation that I wasn't doing "it" (which already happened)... I did NOT want a trial... I did NOT want to do that to her "again" after the previous 5-7 years of her life, being filled with "real physical abuse", courts, lawyers, custody scandals, fires in the home, evictions etc... I couldn't do that to her... I was going to be different than the other men in her life previously... I would lay this one down and take a punishment for something I did not do...
And that's the worst mistake I ever made in my life...
Any course of action I can take on the PMHNP? -- What about her father?.... Slander, maybe liable? for adding fuel to her fire just prior to the super high level of crazyness, and me being arrested?... He told her to call 911 "the next time he does anything to you" but the only problem is that there never was a 1st time... And I've not asked PMHNP personally, but what about any truth he tells her to "get away from me as fast as she can"....
Looking back... With the 'stuff' she was taking... I feel she did exactly what these other people told her to do... What they should have known is that she's bipolar / tripolar / adhd / etc. etc... on fairly heavy meds for it / maybe a cocktail of all kinds of meds both prescribed and "trial or sample" meds... and should have come to me with the "stuff" she was seemingly making up... (being the "spy"?)...
I feel my wife was made into a lab rat for meds and I paid the price for it... 2 years later, I have nothing left... House, Car, Bills, Business... It's all gone, or nearly gone now...

